The Works of Charles and Mary Lamb — Volume 4 / Poems and Plays

by Charles Lamb; Mary Lamb

SECOND FOOTMAN
Let us know who it is——

FIRST FOOTMAN
Who it is we have the honour to serve.

MR. H.
Why me, me, me; you serve me.

SECOND FOOTMAN
Yes, Sir; but we do not know who you are.

MR. H. Childish curiosity! do not you serve a rich master, a gay master, an indulgent master?

FIRST FOOTMAN Ah, Sir! the figure you make is to us, your poor servants, the principal mortification.

SECOND FOOTMAN When we get over a pot at the public-house, or in a gentleman's kitchen, or elsewhere, as poor servants must have their pleasures—when the question goes round, who is your master? and who do you serve? and one says, I serve Lord So-and-so, and another, I am Squire Such-a-one's footman——

FIRST FOOTMAN
We have nothing to say for it, but that we serve Mr. H.

SECOND FOOTMAN
Or Squire H.

MR. H. Really you are a couple of pretty modest, reasonable personages; but I hope you will take it as no offence, gentlemen, if, upon a dispassionate review of all that you have said, I think fit not to tell you any more of my name, than I have chosen for especial purposes to communicate to the rest of the world.