"I shall be fit next term," he said, "and if we get our boat near the head of the river again it won't be so bad after all."
My last year in rooms with Fred, Jack and Henderson was the best of four good years at Oxford. Everything, except Jack's luck, was so exactly right, and I was most delightfully happy. The college was doing as well as we could want, and most of the dons, led I am certain by The Bradder, behaved splendidly. The Freshers' Wine became an organized institution and ceased to be a sort of "hole and corner" entertainment, at which every one made a most horrible noise because they ought not to have made any at all. In my spare time, and I had not much, I caught myself regretting that I had ever been stupid enough to carry on long battles with Mr. Edwardes, it seemed to me that I might have been more peaceful, but the fact remains that he and I were not made for each other.
Until the time began to grow near for me to go down from Oxford I never felt as strong an affection for the 'Varsity as I had for Cliborough. I think the reason was that Oxford is such a huge place, that it took me some time to realize how splendid it is. I missed the feeling of unity which there was at Cliborough, and I supplied my loss by going furiously to work in trying to make the college less slack. Certainly St. Cuthbert's, owing more to Jack's efforts than mine, had changed very much, but in setting our minds absolutely on one thing for two years we had missed a lot, even if we had been successful in what we wanted to do. Our last year, however, made up for everything, and when we came back for the summer term examinations had lost their horrors, and the only thing I regretted was that in eight short weeks my time at Oxford would be over.
The Bradder, who watched over me like a prospective brother-in-law, encouraged me to think that I should not do very badly in the "schools," but I think he was rather agitated when Henderson chose me to play for the 'Varsity against the Gentlemen of England, and in a very bad light I got more wickets than I ever expected to get in a first-class match. That performance gave me a good start in the 'Varsity XI., and The Bradder was desperately afraid that I should stop reading altogether. But Fred and Jack were both hard at work, and except on one evening a week Henderson had to go into a separate room when he wanted to entertain his numerous friends. Jack rowed in our Eight, and they went up to fourth. They would have been second if they had been lucky, but as it was they intended to go to Henley.
I think that I was fortunate in having to struggle for my blue during my last term, for this gave me so much to think about that I escaped some of the feelings which Fred had about leaving Oxford. I felt that I was by no means ready to go, but I was also desperately eager to get into the XI., and that I knew would not be decided until the term was over. One leaves Oxford slowly, if I may express it so; you have to come back for a vivâ voce, and then for your degree; there is no abrupt break as there is at school, and the fact that I was playing for the 'Varsity after the term was over, helped me more than it did Fred, who had played in the XI. for three years. Nearly every Sunday afternoon during May and June, Fred and I quite solemnly went out for a walk together, and we nearly always found ourselves by the river. I believe this was because we were never tired of looking at Corpus and Merton from the Christchurch meadows. There is no view so keenly rooted in my memory as this, nor one which I am so glad to look upon again. I don't care in the least whether it is the most beautiful in Oxford or not, for it means something to me, and you can ask no more from a view than that. I can never look at it without remembering many things which were all of them very pleasant, and Oxford is the place to build up memories.
The term slipped by far too fast, and we found ourselves plunged into the schools. For once in my life I should have been glad not to see the sun, but the week during which we had to put on paper the results of over two years' work was most cruelly hot, and all of us were glad when it was over. It is no use guessing how you have done in honour schools, for those who think they have got a first are too often surprised when the lists come out, and unless you are going to guess something nice, it is much better to leave it alone altogether. With one consent Fred, Jack and I refused to talk about our chances, and set out to enjoy the few days which remained to us without being harrowed by doubts and fears. I did, however, have secret dips into a political economy book, for I thought if the examiners shared my opinion they would wonder how little of this subject I knew. I couldn't keep away from the wretched thing, try as I would, and was always reading "Adam Smith" and "Walker" at odd moments. I think my nerves must have been upset.
Directly after the schools were over, Jack and I had to go to a dinner which Murray got up. I was ready to go to anything, but I had no idea that this was a sort of entertainment organized in honour of us until I got to it. The Bradder took the chair, and I am sure that I tried to feel grateful to Murray, but if you don't care much about being set on a small pedestal it is very hard to pretend that you do. I did, however, enjoy that dinner because every one was so very cheerful, and I made a speech which lasted—counting the applause—nearly ten minutes. The Bradder spoke more about Jack than me, which was very thoughtful of him, and Jack told me afterwards that this evening almost made up for having missed his blue. The things which were said about him took him most completely by surprise, and the fact that he was really appreciated and that the college owed something to him, sent him off to Henley a happier man than he had ever been in his life.
My place in the eleven was in doubt until the last game before the 'Varsity match, and then I bowled one of the best batsmen in England—I must add off his pads—and got three men caught in the slips. Henderson gave me my blue in the pavilion at Lord's and simply banged me on the back as he did it, a very unorthodox and pleasant ending to what had been a great anxiety. Fred, too, was most uproariously delighted, and I should think that some of the people, who seem to think that the pavilion at Lord's is a kind of cathedral, must have decided that the Oxford XI. had suddenly gone mad. But I disentangled myself after a time from men who wanted to congratulate me, and started sending telegrams. I was guilty at that moment of trying to think of people to whom I could telegraph with decency, but I had wanted to play against Cambridge very much. We had been beaten in all the last three matches, and as Fred had never really played well at Lord's, I think some men were inclined to say that he was not anything like as good a cricketer as he was supposed to be. But in this match he settled that question once and for ever. We went in first and started terribly, Henderson was caught at the wicket, and another man was bowled before we had made a run. I could not have smiled at the best joke in the world. Then Fred and a left-hander got well set, and before we had finished our total was over 350. Fred never gave a chance until he had made well over a hundred, and though some men told me that he was out l.b.w. at least four times, there are always plenty of people who think that they know more than the umpires.
The Cambridge men failed in the first innings, and I only bowled six overs, which annoyed my mother and Nina, because they said that I was there to bowl. But after Cambridge went in again they played an uphill game most splendidly, and my people had plenty of opportunity to see me bowl. I got four men out, and Henderson was very pleased with me, but I was not a first-class bowler, though I tried hard to look like one. We had nearly two hundred runs to win, and I confess that I was afraid that I might have to go in when there were two or three runs still wanted. In the first innings my efforts as a batsman had been brief and glorious, I had received three balls, two of which I had hit to the boundary and the third I meant to go to the same place, only somebody caught it. I hoped sincerely that my part in the 'Varsity match was over, but whenever a wicket fell I had a very bad moment. I did not, however, have to make that long journey from the pavilion to the wickets again, for Henderson, who kept himself back in the second innings, played beautifully, and we won with some wickets in hand. I don't want to forget the wholesome thrill which I had when Henderson made the winning stroke, and I am quite certain that I never shall forget it.
My father and mother, too, were pleased, and I was very glad to see their delight, for I thought that I might have added more to their anxiety than to their pleasure during the last four years.