MY FIRST JACK-KNIFE.
1. I remember it well! Its horn handle, so smooth and clear, glowing with the unmeaning, but magic word, "Bunkum;" and the blade significantly inviting you to the test, by the two monosyllables, "Try me."
2. I know not how it is, but I never could take half the comfort in any thing which I have since possessed, that I took in this jack-knife. I earned it myself; and, therefore, I had a feeling of independence; it was bought with my own money,—not teazed out of my uncle, or still kinder father,—money that I had silently earned on the afternoons of those days set apart for boys to amuse themselves.
3. Yes! with a spirit of persevering industry and self-denial, at which I now wonder, I went, every afternoon, during "berry-time," and picked the ripened fruit with eagerness; for my heart was in the task. I sold my berries, and, carefully reserving the proceeds, shortly accumulated enough to purchase the treasure, for which I so eagerly longed.
4. I went to one of the village-stores, and requested the clerk to show me his jack-knives; but he, seeing that I was only a boy, and thinking that I merely meant to amuse myself in looking at the nicest, and wishing it was mine, told me not to plague him, as he was otherwise engaged.
5. I turned with indignation; but I felt the inward comfort of a man who has confidence in his own resources, and knows he has the power in his own hands. I quietly jingled the money in my pockets, and went to the opposite store. I asked for jack-knives, and was shown a lot fresh from the city, which were temptingly laid down before me, and left for me to select one, while the trader went to another part of his store to wait upon an older customer. I looked over them, opened them, breathed upon the blades, and shut them again.
6. One was too hard to open, another had no spring; finally, after examining them with all the judgment which, in my opinion, the extent of the investment required, I selected one with a hole through the handle; and, after a dissertation with the owner upon jack-knives in general, and this one in particular,—upon hawk-bill, and dagger-blades,—and handles, iron, bone, and buck-horn,—I succeeded in closing a bargain.
7. I took the instrument I had purchased, and felt a sudden expansion of my boyish frame! It was my world! I deposited it in my pocket among other valuables,—twine, marbles, slate-pencils, &c. I went home to my father; I told him how long I had toiled for it, and how eagerly I had spent time, which others had allotted to play, to possess myself of my treasure.
8. My father gently chided me for not telling him of my wants; but I observed his glistening eye turn affectionately to my mother and then to me, and I thought that his manly form seemed to straighten up and to look prouder than I had ever before seen him. At any rate, he came to me, and, patting my curly head, told me there was no object in life, which was reasonably to be desired, that honesty, self-denial, well-directed industry, and perseverance would not place within my reach; and if, through life, I carried the spirit of independent exertion into practice, which I had displayed in the purchase of the jack-knife, I should become a "great man."
9. From that moment, I was a new being. I had discovered that I could rely upon myself. I took my jack-knife, and many a time, while cutting the walnut-saplings for my bow, or the straight pine for my arrow, or carving my mimic ship, did I muse upon these words of my father,—so deeply are the kind expressions of a judicious parent engraven on the heart and memory of boyhood.