Again, he said, I deserve all I suffer, for I am a great sinner.
I heard all this, but do not know how long I had been by him, when he said to me, Charlotte, I have loved you always-dearly loved you-and I love you to the end. Then turning his eye towards your father, who was on the opposite side of him, said he, Louis, I leave my family to you-my wife I leave to you.
Some gentleman came up and asked, Mr. Charless, who shot you? He replied, A man by the name of Thornton. I was called upon to testify against him in court last fall. While President of the Bank of Missouri, he brought me some bank notes to redeem. They were stained and had the appearance of having been buried. I asked him where he got those notes. He replied, he had bought them from some boatmen, who said they had found them under a stump, which had been pulled up from a boat having been tied to it. I told him that was a very unlikely story. When called upon to testify, I told, upon oath, what I knew about the matter, but I had no unkind feeling towards the poor fellow. I would have done him a kindness if it had been in my power. I have always tried to be a good neighbor-to do justly-and to love mercy. But I honor my country, and the majesty of her laws, and I have never shrunk from discharging my duty as a man, and as a Christian.
Sometime afterwards he said, How little we know what is before us.
I remember, my children, in that dark hour, to have seen your dear mother, kneeling at the head of her precious father, in the deepest woe, alternating between glimmerings of hope, and agonizing fear.
To some remark of Col Grimsley, he said, No, Colonel, no! I forgive my murderer; from the bottom of my heart, I forgive him.
Some one asked him if he would not like to see a minister. He answered, Send for Mr. McPheeters. You will find him at the Second Presbyterian Church, at the meeting of the Church Extension Committee.
My dear Pastor, I am glad to see you, I have always loved you.
You have tried to instruct men, and I thank you for it.
My beloved sister, for whom my heart is now bleeding-for she too has left us and gone away, to return no more to cheer, to sympathize with, and to comfort us in our sorrows-was at my brothers, six miles from the city, and was late in meeting with us at this mournful scene. When she arrived, in broken accents she asked, Is there no hope? Is there no hope? No hope here, replied my husband, but a bright hope beyond!
Thank God! for the bright hope which I have that they met again, not, as then, in sorrow, but in the full enjoyment of the blissful presence of the adorable Jesus! But, come back my thoughts from that joyous abode, to the once happy little earthly home, I used to have, and go with me, dear children, to the same parlors, where your dear mother has had so much pleasure in the days of her youth, and behold, laid on a narrow couch, in agony and blood, that noble form. The beloved and admired of all who knew him. The rooms, the halls, are filled with anxious friends, but stillness reigns. Not a sound is heard save the involuntary groans of the dying Christian. In the midst of them he would sometimes exclaim, God have mercy upon me a sinner!