JULIET.In this book, this dastardly attack—
Yet, you dear noble girl, at least it's shown
That to you my misfortunes are your own.

HELEN. Juliet—what do you mean? Sometimes your gibes
Are most ill-timed. You know the book describes
Me.

JULIET. You're not serious?

HELEN.I? Of course I am....
And now that I've discovered what a sham
You were with all your sympathy, I could hurl
The foul book at your head. You heartless girl!
Is this a time to mock me, to pretend
You care so much about your slandered friend
That you won't stay in England? If that's your
Notion of fun, it isn't mine, be sure.

JULIET. I wasn't being funny—not a bit,
Really. It's simply that the cap does fit—
I am Calypso!

HELEN.Well, I never heard
Such nonsense in my life. It's too absurd.
Oh, if I could but think that one or two
Readers might fancy it was meant for you,
I'd take some pleasure in my life again,
Dance, have a feast of oysters and champagne,
Buy a new winter frock and hat, instead
Of wishing, as I do, that I were dead.
For you deserve it—you that make a joke
Out of my misery.

JULIET.Helen—when I spoke
Of being Calypso, didn't I, to my shame,
Own the wild sins that cluster round her name?
Alas, I meant it.

HELEN.Nobody could be
So blind as not to know it's me—I—me:
And since you're now my enemy, I shall go
At once. But after this, I'd have you know,
Our friendship's dead—for always! Please forget
You ever knew me.

JULIET.Helen, don't go yet....