It is known that there is much more homosexuality in girls’ or boys’ schools than there is at co-educational institutions. One study showed that one-third of married women have had at some time in their unmarried days intense emotional relations with other women, even though some did not recognize the behavior as sexual in character. There is every reason to believe that more women engage in homosexual behavior than is true of men. This is understandable in view of the fact that expressions of affection between women are much more acceptable than is true of expressions of affection between men. Nobody thinks anything of two women greeting each other with a kiss, walking hand in hand or with arms clasped about each other. Men would be looked upon suspiciously if they engaged in any such behavior.
Still other abnormal outlets sexual feeling will take if it is not provided with normal or acceptable forms of expression are:
—Voyeurism, or “Peeping Tom” behavior, brought about by curiosity about sexual behavior of other individuals because the person is repressed and lacks sexual information himself.
—Fetishism, which produces an unnatural sex attachment to objects rather than persons. The objects may be shoes, hair curls, wearing apparel. The possession and fondling of such articles create arousal and satisfaction of sex feelings.
—Pedophilia, or unnatural attachment for children, perhaps because it offers them a “safe” way to inspect and caress human anatomy.
—Sadism and masochism. The first feeling comes from inflicting pain on another, the second from having pain inflicted on one’s self. This involves the sensual feeling of pleasure-after-pain which we have already mentioned.
But to get back to the problem of finding socially approved outlets for sexual feeling before marriage. We would advise couples rigorously to refrain from direct sexual stimulation and other below-the-shoulder petting until marriage is fairly imminent if they hope to abstain from intercourse before marriage. The excitation of such petting is apt to swirl a couple into complete intimacy despite their best intentions not to go that far.
We would not undertake to advise young people how far they should go in their petting, but feel that every young person—as a part of his or her personal philosophy of life—should decide just what his limits should be. When the limit is set here are some hints on how to make it stick.
—Reserve even your good-night kisses for people you are genuinely fond of. A girl should not cheapen them by letting a casual date lead her to the davenport to collect a reward for taking her out. And don’t fall into the error of thinking that free-and-easy petting will increase your popularity. It won’t except with people who would make unstable mates anyway.