After he has had his back rubbed, or after he has finished shaving each side of his beard, he sometimes good-humouredly looks his valet in the face for a few seconds, and then gives him a smart box on the ear, accompanied by some jocular expressions. This has been construed by libelists and pamphleteers into the habit of cruelly beating those who were about him. We all in our turns occasionally received a pinch or a box on the ear; but from the expressions which always accompanied the action, we thought ourselves very happy in receiving such favours during the period of his power.
This calls to my recollection, and explains to me certain observations which I once heard from the Duke Decrès, one of the Emperor’s ministers. The Duke, when in the height of his glory and power, wished to obtain a certain favour from the Emperor. He was conversing with me on the subject, and after adverting to all his chances of success, he said: “I shall have it after all, the first time I get roughly treated.” And, remarking that my countenance expressed surprise, he added with a significant smile: "But, my dear fellow, after all ’tis not so terrible a thing as you imagine; many would be happy to receive such usage, I assure you." ...
The Emperor does not leave his chamber until he is completely dressed. He wears shoes in the morning, and does not put on his boots until he rides out on horseback. When he first came to Longwood, he laid aside his green uniform of the Guard, and wore a hunting coat the lace of which had been taken off. This coat soon began to look shabby, and his attendants were at a loss what to substitute for it. This, however, was not the only inconvenience of the kind to which he was exposed. For instance, we were much distressed to see him reduced to the necessity of wearing one pair of silk stockings for several days in succession; but he laughed whenever we expressed our regret on this subject, or remarked that it was easy to count the number of days the stockings had been worn, by the marks which the shoes had left on them. In other respects he retained his usual dress; namely, waistcoat and small clothes of white kerseymere, and a black cravat. When he was going out, any one of the gentlemen who happened to be in the room handed to him his hat; that little hat which has in some measure become identified with his person. Several of the Emperor’s hats have been carried off since we have been on the island; for every individual who approaches him is anxious to obtain some token of remembrance of him. How often have we been tormented even by persons of distinguished rank, to procure for them even a button of his coat or any other trifle belonging to him.
I was almost always present at the Emperor’s toilet: sometimes I remained after having finished my writing, and sometimes the Emperor desired me to come and chat with him. One day I was looking steadfastly at him as he put on his flannel waistcoat. My countenance I suppose expressed something particular, for he said in his good humoured way of addressing me: “Well, what does your Excellency smile at? What are you thinking of at this moment.”—"Sire, in a pamphlet which I lately read, I found it stated that your Majesty was shielded by a coat of mail for the security of your person. A report of the same kind was circulated among certain classes in Paris; and in support of the assertion, allusion was made to your Majesty’s sudden embonpoint, which was said to be quite unnatural. I was just now thinking that I could bear positive evidence to the contrary, and that at St. Helena, at least, all precautions for personal safety have been laid aside."—"This is one of the thousand absurdities that have been published respecting me," said he. "But the story you have just mentioned is the more ridiculous, since every person about me well knows how careless I am in regard to self-preservation. Accustomed from the age of eighteen to be exposed to cannon-balls, and knowing the inutility of precautions, I abandoned myself to my fate. When I came to the head of affairs, I might still have fancied myself surrounded by the danger of the field of battle: and I might have regarded the conspiracies that were formed against me as so many bomb-shells. But I followed my old course; I trusted to my lucky star; and left all precautions to the police. I was perhaps the only sovereign in Europe who dispensed with a body guard. Every one could freely approach me without having, as it were, to pass through military barracks; the sentinels at the outer gates being passed, all had free access to every part of my palace. Maria Louisa was much astonished to see me so poorly guarded; and she often remarked that her father was surrounded by bayonets. For my part, I had no better defence at the Tuileries than I have here: I don’t even know where to find my sword; do you see it?" said he, looking about for it.... “I have, to be sure,” he continued, "incurred great dangers. Upwards of thirty plots were formed against me: these have been proved by authentic testimony, without mentioning many that never came to light. Some sovereigns invent conspiracies against themselves; for my part, I made it a rule carefully to conceal them whenever I could. The crisis most serious to me was during the interval between the battle of Marengo and the attempt of Georges, and the affair of the Duke d’Enghien."
Napoleon related that about a week before the arrest of Georges, a petition had been delivered into his own hands, on the parade, by one of the most determined of the conspirators. Others insinuated themselves among the household at St. Cloud or Malmaison; finally Georges himself seems to have been so near his person as to have been in the same apartment with him.
Independently of good luck, the Emperor attributes his safety, in a great measure, to certain circumstances which were peculiar to himself. That which had doubtless, he said, contributed to preserve him was his having lived after his own fancy; without any regular habits or fixed plan. His close occupations kept him much at home, and almost constantly confined him to his closet. He never dined abroad, seldom visited the theatres, and never appeared but at those times and places at which he was not expected.
As we were descending to the garden after the Emperor had finished dressing, he observed to me that the two designs on his life which had placed him in the most imminent danger were those of Cerachi the sculptor, and the fanatic of Schönbrunn. Cerachi, and some other desperate wretches, had laid a plan for assassinating the First Consul. They agreed to carry their design into execution at the moment of his withdrawing from his box at the theatre. Napoleon, who received intimation of the plot nevertheless proceeded to the theatre, and fearlessly passed by the conspirators, who had shown themselves most eager to occupy their respective stations. They were not arrested until about the middle or near the close of the performance.
Cerachi, said the Emperor, had formerly adored the First Consul; but he vowed to sacrifice him, when, as he pretended, he proved himself a tyrant. This artist had been loaded with favours by General Bonaparte, whose bust he had executed; and, when he entered into the plot against his benefactor, he endeavoured by every possible means to procure another sitting, under pretence of making an essential improvement on the bust. Fortunately, at that time, the Consul had not a single moment’s leisure, and, thinking that want was the real cause of the urgent solicitations of the sculptor, he sent him six thousand francs. But how was he mistaken! Cerachi’s real motive was to stab him during the sitting.
The conspiracy was disclosed by a captain of the line, who was himself an accomplice. “This,” said Napoleon, “was a proof of the strange modifications of which the human mind is susceptible, and shows to what lengths the combinations of folly and stupidity may be carried! This officer regarded me with horror as First Consul, though he had adored me as a General. He wished to see me driven from my post, but he rejected the idea of any attempt upon my life. He wished that I should be secured, but would not have me injured in any way; and he proposed that I should be sent back to the army to face the enemy and defend the glory of France. The rest of the conspirators laughed at these notions; but, when he found that they were distributing poniards and going far beyond his intentions, he then came and disclosed the whole to the Consul.”
As we were discoursing on this subject, some one present mentioned having witnessed at the Theatre Feydeau, a circumstance which threw a part of the audience into the greatest consternation. The Emperor entered the Empress Josephine’s box, and had scarcely taken his seat, when a young man hastily jumped upon the bench immediately below the Box, and placed his hand on the Emperor’s breast. The spectators on the opposite side were filled with alarm. Fortunately, however, the young man was merely presenting a petition, which the Emperor received and read with the utmost coolness.