“We should have to invent a subtle rule by which to distinguish them, for most often those who are seemingly the best, in fact are quite the contrary.”

Then messer Bernardo said, laughing:

“If we had not present here my lord Magnifico, who is everywhere accounted the champion of women, I should undertake to answer you; but I am unwilling to do him wrong.”

Here my lady Emilia said, also laughing:

“Women have need of no champion against an accuser of so little weight. So leave my lord Gaspar in his perverse opinion,—which arises from his never having found a lady to look at him, rather than from any fault on their part,—and go on with your talk about pleasantries.”

70.—Then messer Bernardo said:

“In truth, my Lady, methinks I have told of many situations from which we can derive sharp witticisms, which then have the more grace the more they are accompanied by fine narrative. Still many others might be mentioned. As when, by overstatement or understatement, we say things that outrageously exceed the probable; and of this sort was what Mario da Volterra[[261]] said of a prelate, that he held himself so great a man that when he entered St. Peter’s, he stooped in order not to strike his head against the architrave of the portal. Again, our friend here the Magnifico said that his servant Galpino was so lean and light that in blowing the fire to kindle it one morning, the fellow had been carried by the smoke all the way up the chimney to the very top; but happening to be brought crosswise against one of the openings, he had the good luck not to be blown away with the smoke.

“Another time messer Agostino Bevazzano[[262]] said that a miser, who had been unwilling to sell his grain while it was dear, afterwards hanged himself in despair from a rafter of his bedroom when he found that the price had greatly fallen; and one of his servants ran in on hearing the noise, saw the miser hanging, and quickly cut the rope and thus rescued him from death. Then, having come to himself, the miser insisted that his servant should pay him for the rope that had been cut.

AGOSTINO BEVAZZANO
Flor. 1500