The inconsiderate guest who arrives late for luncheon or dinner is shown immediately into the dining-room, and the hostess does not leave her guests, but simply rises and motions him to a seat when he enters the room.
Ten minutes is the time usually allowed for each course where more than a six-course dinner is served.
The correct and usual way of seating a bridal party at a wedding entertainment is for the groom to sit at one end of the table, and the bride at the other end, the best man on the bride’s right, and the maid of honor or first bridemaid on the groom’s right. The other bridemaids and ushers are placed wherever seems best. As a usual thing, the parents of the bride and groom do not sit at the same table with the immediate bridal party, but at another table, together with the near relatives on both sides, and perhaps the minister who officiated at the wedding and his wife; but if it seems desirable to have the parents at the bridal table, it is perfectly proper to seat them there.
There are certain distinctive features of a bridal table which must be in evidence. One is the wedding or bride’s cake, and this cake should be the central ornament, and should be surrounded with a wreath of roses. The place-cards should have the initials of the bride and groom woven together for decoration, and the souvenirs may be small satin boxes containing wedding cake.
SERVANTS AND SERVING.
There is so much to say upon the subject of servants, notwithstanding so much has already been said, it is difficult to know where to begin. But, in the first place, every woman should remember that servants are, like herself, human, and that in our free America, they are becoming very independent, not to say self-assertive. Thus a house mistress has no small matter to deal with when she demands obedience and respectful attention from girls who are generally ignorant, and often impudent and ill-bred. The greatest strength of the mistress lies in her power to control herself, and while she must demand respectfulness from her servants, she can often avoid a clash with them by using a little tact. If they are treated in a kind, though dignified, manner, unless very degenerate, they will usually respond satisfactorily.
One can speak, with perfect propriety, of the one servant employed as “the maid,” but not as “our girl.”
Servants should be expected to dress neatly, and where there is but one, she should have a clean white apron ready to put on when answering the door-bell, being prepared with a tray to receive the caller’s card. She should also know, before answering the bell, who is in and who is not at home, and what excuse, if any, to make for each one called for.
Servants should never be allowed to call any member of the family from a distance, as from the foot of the stairs, but should go to the one to whom she wishes to speak, and deliver her message.
It is hard to say, under all circumstances, what to expect of a nursery governess, and what should be her privileges. To treat her with the greatest consideration is well worth while; for one is compensated in being able to get an intelligent, ladylike woman who may be trusted to guide her charges wisely. One may ask a governess to sleep in the same room with the children, dress and undress them, eat with them, and teach them, and take the entire charge of them; but, of course, one will provide some attractive place for her to sit during the evening, while the children are asleep in her room. It is also necessary to see that her meals are well cooked and carefully served, and to permit her to be free one afternoon and evening every week. She should be addressed as “Miss Smith,” not by her first name.