“An’ how do we proceed?” asked Jim.
“You’ll be hiding behind the tank, and when the fireman’s wrestling with the spout an’ the engineer’s watching his signals so as to place the engine, you’ll step quietly aboard, holding your gun close to the engineer, but not offensively close so as to enable him to take it away from you.”
“An’ must I pint it butt fust, er nozzle fust? You know I hain’t never handled a gun afore.”
“Well, if you handle it as recklessly as you handle the English language you’ll kill the man on sight. Well, to my tale: Pete will uncouple the train the moment the engineer has placed the engine and wait for me.”
“An’ what’ll the great man do?” demanded Jim, who was feeling the insult to his grammar.
“The great man will herd the car-hands up through the sleepers and into the day coach, where he will proceed to pacify the passengers. Having slipped into his false face he will pause with his back to the door at the rear of the car, twirl his arsenal playfully, and bid the multitude be quiet. For the further awing of those who may meditate violence he will fire three shots—bang, bang, bang—that shall come like the measured thumping of my lady’s heart, when she sees a cow. These pistol shots will be followed by the tinkling sound of falling glass, for the three glims will have been doused. And, by the same token you shall know, O, Jimmie, and you, my shivering Pete, that your uncle is doing business in the day coach.”
“An’ I’ll come in wud a mail sack an’ git de watches and diamins.”
“Watches! shade of Jesse! Does Two-card Charley rob unarmed men and helpless women? You will devote your time and that mite of gray matter that you are supposed to have in your head to the parting of the train.”
“S’pose some on’ shows fight?”
“Why, apologize and bow yourself out, of course. Oh, Pete! Pete! I’ve tried to make something of you, but it isn’t in the wood. It hurts me to hint such a thing, and yet I know the day will come when I must needs lay violent hands on you; kill you, mayhap, and cache you in the waving grass, you ass.”