“Keep the water on till after they all go to bed, and for an hour or so after, so the roar’ll soothe them to sleep; and if any rich Americans choose to stay up all night, and buy wine, keep it on all night. We must have nothing mean about our waterfall.
PEASANTS OF EASTERN SWITZERLAND.
“There are a great many advantages in this over the natural article. The water can be turned off while the lights are being placed behind the sheet for illuminations, and the flow can be regulated so as to suit every taste. If the party is made up of young ladies who delight in the soft and beautiful, we can make a Minnehaha of it; if it is strong men and old maids who hunger for the grand, why, whack on more steam, and we can have a Niagara.
“About a mile or so away I am going to have a castle in ruins—ruins ain’t expensive where there is so much rock—and I can have any newspaper man write me a proper legend of it for ten dollars. This for the history crank. For the more devout we want the ruins of an ancient church, which was destroyed by whoever you choose. This will fetch all those who are on their way to the Holy Land. They don’t spend as much money for wine as the other classes, but we can make it up in charges for board and guides. The ruins must be so built as to make a guide necessary, and so extensive that two days will be necessary to get the proper views of them, and to study their history understandingly.