Nasby in Exile / or, Six Months of Travel in England, Ireland, Scotland, France, Germany, Switzerland and Belgium, with many things not of travel - David Ross Locke

LONDON is probably the most expensive place to do business in the world. Its business men are conservative, so conservative that they would not for the world part their hair in any way differing from their fathers, nor would they adopt a modern convenience unless it were absolutely necessary to the maintenance of English supremacy, and they would sigh as they parted with an old nuisance for a modern delight. Their professions have all got into ruts from which you can no more move them than you can the Pyramids, and their practices are so established that they may and do do as they please, without regard to the notions of any body.

An American resident in London bargained for a house, and the lease had to be transferred. Now in any country where a common school exists almost anybody can assign a lease, but not so here. A solicitor had to be employed, and afterward a contract long enough to cover a sheet of legal paper had to be drawn up. It was a very plain matter—forty words would have been sufficient. But a solicitor must be employed nevertheless. How much do you suppose it cost Mr. Foote to have this trifle of work done? As a matter of instruction to the American people and for the benefit of American lawyers, who are too modest in their charges, and I am now convinced that the majority of them are, I make a partial copy of the solicitor’s bill, as it is a more interesting document than anything that I can write. Here it is:

THE SOLICITOR’S BILL.

W. M. FOOTE, ESQ., To BLANK, BLANK, SOLICITOR. Re STAR OF THE WEST. PRIOR TO YOURSELF.
	£.	s.	p.
Clerk attending at Messrs. Ingram’s (Vendor’s Solicitors), for draft proposed contract		6	8
Procuring and considering and found same objectionable		6	8
Instructions for contract		6	8
Drawing same, folios twenty	1	11	1
Engrossing in two parts		1	3
Writing Messrs. Ingram with one part		3	6
Writing Mr. Challer for schedule of fixtures to answer to contract		3	6
Same as to appointment for Monday		3	6
Drawing telegram and attending to forward and paid		7	8
Attending you, and then at Messrs. Ingram, engaged a considerable time going through deed and documents, etc., and settling contracts and signing		3	0
Writing your hereon, fully		6	8
Instructions for registration on title		6	8
Drawing same		12	0
Engrossing		4	0
Attending to deliver		6	8
Replying to your letter		3	6
Attending appointing conference		6	8
Engrossing papers, leases and covenants	1	10	0
Attending Dr. Thomson therewith		6	8
Fee to him and clerk	1	3	6
Paid conference fee	1	6	0
Attending conference and cab hire		13	4
Perusing his opinion	1	0	0
Writing you with copy Dr. Thomson’s opinion		6	8
Making copy of schedule and fixtures		5	6
Waiting upon Messrs. Ingram with same		3	6
Perusing abstract	2	10	6
Writing with appointment to examine deeds with abstract		3	6
Attending examining deeds with abstract, self and clerk	2	2	0
Attending searching liquidation proceedings of Arthur Coleman and paid		14	4
As this remarkable document extends over four and a half pages of foolscap paper I will not give it all. However, there are some othercharges worthy of going upon record. For instance this item:
A replying to your letter		3	6
And this:
Attending you long conference, and you left cheque for purchase money	13	4	0
Writing you fully		3	6
Attending appointing conference		3	6

The entire bill footed up forty-two pounds, fourteen shillings and ten pence, which, reduced to bird of freedom money amounts to about two hundred and twenty-five dollars.

And all this for transferring a lease from one party to another, about which operation there couldn’t be the slightest trouble, except as the two attorneys made it.

Doubtless the Messrs. Ingram and Dr. Thomson, whatever he had to do with it, put in a similar bill against their clients, so both sides had a very good thing of it.

But this was not all there was of it. It was necessary that Mr. Foote should have a little article of agreement with Mr. Welch, his manager, not that there was any especial need for it, but as a mere matter of form, as we say when we want a sure thing on somebody. The same attorney was employed to do this, in fact he suggested it and did it before this bill was presented.