Elder Smathers observed that he hed noticed with pain that them niggers alluz hed money, and wuz alluz dresst well, while we, their sooperiors, hed no money, and nothin to boast uv in the way uv close. He wood say—
Pollock, the Illinoy store-keeper, put in. Ef the Elder wood work ez them niggers wuz workin, and not loaf over half the time at Bascom’s grocery, he mite possibly hev a hull soot uv close, and now and then a dollar in money. It wuz here, ez it wuz in all strikly Dimekratic communities, the grocery keepers absorb all the floatin capital, and—
He wuz not allowed to proceed. Bascom flung a chair at him, and four or five uv his constitooents fell on him. He wuz carried out for dead. Bascom remarked that he wuz for the utmost freedom uv speech, but in the discussion uv a grate Constooshnel question, no Illinoy Ablishnist shood put in his yawp. The patriotic remark wuz cheered, but when Bascom ask’t the whole meetin out to drink, the applause wuz uproarious. Bascom alluz gets applause; he knows how to move an audience.
Deekin Pogram sed he’d bore with them niggers till his patience wuz gin out. He endoored it till last Sunday. After service he felt pensive, ruther, and walked out towards Garrettstown, meditatin, as he went, on the sermon he hed listened to that mornin on the necessity uv the spread of the Gospil. Mournin in sperit over the condition of the heathen, he didn’t notis where he wuz till he found hisself in the nigger settlement, and in front uv one uv their houses. There he saw a site wich paralyzed him. There wuz a nigger, wich wuz wunst his nigger, wich Linkin deprived him uv, settin under his porch, and a profanin the Holy Bible by teachin his child to read it! “Kin this be endoored?” the Deekin asked.
Deekin Parkins sed he must bear his unworthy testimony agin these disturbers. They hed—he knowd whereof he spoke—hired a female woman from Massachusetts to teach their children! He hed bin in their skool-room, and with his own eyes witnest it.
Bascom, the grocery keeper, hed bin shocked at their conduct. He wuz convinct that a nigger wuz a beast. They come to the Corners to sell the produx of their lands; do they leave their money at his bar? Nary! They spend sum uv it at the store uv a disorganizer from Illinoy, who is here interferin with the biznis uv troo Southern men, but he hed never seed one uv em inside his door. He hed no pashence with em, and believed suthin shood be done to rid the community uv sich yooseless inhabitance. Ef they ever git votes they’r agin us. No man who dodges my bar ever votes straight Dimocrisy.
Ginral Punt moved that this meetin do to wunst proceed to the settlement, and clean em out. They wuz a reproach to Kentucky. Of course, ez they were heathens and savages, sich goods ez they hed wood fall to the righteous, uv whom we wuz which, and he insisted upon a fair divide. All he wanted wuz a bureau and a set uv chairs he hed seen.
The motion wuz amendid to inclood Pollock, the Illinoy store-keeper, and it wuz to wunst acted upon.
Pollock wuz reconstructed first. Filled with zeal for the right, his door wuz bustid in, and in a jiffy the goods wich he wuz a contaminatin our people with wuz distributed among the people, each takin sich ez sooted em. Wun man sejested that ez they wuz made by Yankees, and brought south by Yankees, that there wuz contaminashen in the touch uv em, and that they be burned, but he wuz hooted down, our people seein a distinction. The contaminashen wuz in payin for em; gittin em gratooitusly took the cuss off.
Elated, the crowd started for the settlement. I never saw more zeal manifested. A half hour brought us there, and then a scene ensood wich filled me with joy onspeekable. The niggers wuz routed out, and their goods wuz bundled after em. The Bibles and skool books wuz destroyed first, coz we hed no use for them; their chairs, tables, and bureaus, clothin and beddin, wuz distributed. A wooman hed the impudence to beg for suthin she fancied, when the righteous zeal uv my next door neighbor, Pettus, biled over, and he struck her. Her husband, forgettin his color, struck Pettus, and the outrage wuz completed. A nigger hed raised his hand agin a white man!