How can you make a tall man short? Borrow money of him.
Why are fixed stars like pens, ink and paper? Because they are stationary (stationery).
Why should a person not like to gaze on the Niagara forever? Because he would always have a cataract in the eye.
What bridge is warranted to support any strain? The bridge of a fiddle.
What is that, which though black itself, enlightens the world? Ink.
Why is it dangerous to go in the woods in spring? Because the bullrush is out, the cowslips around, the grasses have blades, the flowers have pistils, and the little twigs are shooting.
Why are laws like the ocean? The most trouble is caused by the breakers.
Why is the Mississippi the most eloquent of rivers? Because it has a dozen mouths.
Why is the fly the best one among the grocers’ customers? Because, when he comes for sugar, he settles on the spot.
Why does an aeronaut dislike to speak about his trips? It is generally a soar point with him.