But since ’tis so ye will come on,
The greatest w—— throw the first stone.
When he had ended with these words, “The greatest w—— throw the first stone,” every one put it to another to cast the first stone, but knowing they would attain the character of a w—— for so doing, they all refused till the dying hour was past, and then he took a protest against them, and by that means he gained his life. After this he was admitted into the queen’s favour and presence, and attended the court as formerly.
4. About this time, the French king, in order to pick a quarrel with the court of Britain, sent a letter to the king, desiring it to be read before the parliament: and the writing was as follows; “Will I come? Will I come? Will I come?”—This letter being read before the king and his courtiers, they all concluded that the French king designed to invade England; therefore they ordered an answer to be wrote, upbraiding him with the breach of peace, and putting him in mind of the last treaty. The answer being read before the king and his nobles, they all agreed that it should be sent off. But George, smiling, and shaking his head, cried out,
Many men, many minds,
Who knows what he designs?
Then they asked George what the French king meant by such a letter? to which he answered, I suppose he wants an invitation to come over to dine with you, and then return in a friendly manner; but you are going to charge him with a breach of peace, before he has given any signal of offence or war: his letter is indeed dark and mystical, but send him an answer according to his question. Now, George being ordered to write the answer, it was as follows:—“And ye come—And ye come—And ye come.” This being sent to the French king, he admired it beyond expression, saying, it was an answer more valiant and daring than he expected. So the enmity he intended was extinguished, and turned into love.
5. It happened once, that a malignant party in Scotland sent up a great spokesman to the king and parliament, for the reducing of the church; George hearing of his coming, went away and met him on the bridge, and the salutation that he gave him was the cutting off his head, and throwing it over the bridge! He then ran to the king with all his might, and fell down before him, pleading most heartily for a pardon, or without it he was a dead man. The king most seriously asked him what he had done now? To which he answered, he had only thrown the Scots Bishop’s hat over the bridge, which made the king to laugh, to hear him ask pardon for such a small fault; but he had no sooner got the pardon sealed by the king’s hand, than he said, indeed my sovereign, I threw his hat over the bridge, but his head was in it. O Geordie, Geordie, says the king, thou wilt never give over till thou be hanged.
6. A nobleman in England agreed with the king how to put a trick upon George, to try his manly courage, in sending him to a certain place for a bag of money. On his way home, through St James’ park, they caused a sturdy fellow to go and set upon him by the way, and take the money from him. The fellow being armed with sword and pistol, came up quickly, and attacked George with these words, You, sir, deliver what money you have, or you are a dead man. To which George answered, sir, I have some indeed, but ’tis not my own, and therefore do not like to part with it: nevertheless, since being determined as you are, to exchange blows for it, pray do me the favour to fire your pistol through the flap of my cloak, that the owners may see I have been in danger of my life before I parted with it, which he accordingly did. No sooner had he fired the pistol, than George whipt out his hanger from below his cloak and with one stroke cut off his right hand, wherein he held his sword, so that both his sword and the hand fell to the ground; but George lifted his hand and carried it to the king. No sooner did he come before them, but they asked him, saying, well, George, did you see any body to trouble you by the way? None, said he, but one fellow, who was going to take the money from me, but I made him give me his hand he would not do the like again. You did? says the fellow’s master. Yes, I did, says George; let work bear witness, throwing down the fellow’s hand on the table before them all.
7. Now, this last exploit of George’s caused many of the English to hate him; and, among the rest, a young nobleman fell a joking of George, saying, he would be as famous a champion for Scotland as Sir William Wallace was. Ay, ay, says George, Wallace was a brave man in his time.—True indeed, says the young nobleman, but when he came to London, we did him all manner of justice, and for honour of the Scots, we have his effigy in the s—— to this very day. And do you know the reason of that, says George? No, I don’t, says he. Well, I’ll tell you, says George: he was such a terror to Englishmen, when he was alive, that the sight of his picture yet makes them p—— themselves. The English took this answer as a great affront, and forthwith caused Wallace’s picture to be taken out of all their s——.