But leaving the region of debate, it will be refreshing to turn to a humorous story on record, as to the competition Graham had to face before he became bellman. There were many applicants for the situation, and the magistrates decided that the merits of each should be put to a practical test. Accordingly all the candidates were instructed to be present on a certain day in the back-yard of the old Town’s Hospital, then situated in what is now known as Great Clyde Street. The magistrates were present as judges, and there were with them, no doubt, many of the leading citizens to witness the interesting spectacle. All the other competitors having shown their skill with the bell, and demonstrated the quality of their vocal powers, Dougal’s turn came. He entered into the spirit of the contest, and his physical peculiarities would greatly assist him. He rang the bell in a surprising manner, and called out in stentorian tones—

‘Caller herring at the Broomielaw,

Three a penny, three a penny!’

adding, pawkily—

‘Indeed, my friends,

But it’s a’ a blewflum,

For the herring’s no catch’d,

And the boat’s no come.’

The victory was his, and the other competitors were out of the reckoning. He had shown himself every way suited for the office—to be endowed with that ready wit which has always been a characteristic of the true Scottish bellman—and he was accordingly invested with the official garments, and with the magisterial authority to exercise his new calling. In the year 1774, probably two or three years after the events just related, the third edition of Graham’s History of the Rebellion, with amendments, was published. This edition, like its predecessors, was successful, and it is understood to be the last edition issued during the author’s lifetime. Dougal, as an official of the Corporation of Glasgow, had now become a personage of no little importance in the community. These were not the days of cheap advertisements, reaching half-a-million readers in a few hours, or of posters and handbills apprising the lieges of meetings and sales, or of the lost, stolen, and strayed. All this Graham, with the aid of his bell, had to intimate to the public. The ‘trial scene’ affords a specimen of the kind of work he had to perform. He had also, to a certain extent, to act as attendant on the magistracy. The story goes that Dougal was on one occasion passing along the Gallowgate, making some intimation or another. Several officers of the 42nd Highlanders, then returned from the American War of Independence, where their regiment had been severely handled by the colonists, were dining in the Saracen’s Head Inn, situated at the foot of the Dovehill. They knew Dougal of old, and they thought to have a joke at his expense. One of them put his head out of the window, and called to the bellman—‘What’s that you’ve got on your back, Dougal?’ This was rather a personal reference, for Dougal had the misfortune to be ‘humphie backit.’ But he was not put out by the question, for he at once silenced his interrogator by answering—‘It’s Bunker’s Hill; do you choose to mount?’ The good stories about Graham are said to have been legion, but they have, unfortunately, been allowed to die out; otherwise, a collection of his jokes and bons mots might have been a formidable rival to the now classical Joe Miller.

But death put an end to Dougal’s happy-go-lucky existence while he was still in the prime of life. He died on the 20th of July, 1779, at the age of fifty-five or fifty-six, in what circumstances, or of what trouble, cannot now be discovered. These were not the days of newspaper obituaries, or he would certainly have been awarded a half-column notice. This, of itself, is unfortunate, for then many biographical details could have been obtained, and subsequent writers of Graham’s life would have been able to produce a record of his career more satisfactory to themselves and their readers. That Dougal did not die unregretted, is witnessed by an elegy of twelve stanzas, written at the time of his death by some unknown poetaster. This lament has, unfortunately, only come down to the present generation in a fragmentary form, Dr. Strang[7] having preserved seven of the verses:—