There is a class of women who possess comfortable homes, with a maid to do the work, whose home duties are not confining and who find themselves with a great deal of extra time on their hands. To these women the days are long and they endeavor to pass away the time by doing nerve racking fancy work or by "fussing" around the house. They are not happy and contented, chiefly because their minds are being neglected—are growing up to weeds like a neglected garden. For such a woman club work is a boon. She should take up some especial kind of work, and devote several hours a day to the study of it. At first this will be hard, for a mind that has fallen into lazy ways is not easily aroused to continual effort, the deeply rooted weeds are not easily destroyed.
Many half contented women realize this need of mental food but hesitate. As one woman said, "Why, my husband would leave me if I started to work!" Some men take a peculiar attitude towards women. They would like to treat them as a woman treats her pet dog. The dog is provided with a comfortable home, plenty of food, someone to bathe it and carry it around. The dog is contented with this. It loves to sleep and eat the livelong day; it comes when its mistress calls, and goes when she is tired of it. Unfortunately, perhaps, all women cannot be contented with such a life. The woman was given a brain which refuses to be dormant. If it is not required to be used in a useful way, it occupies itself with bad thoughts—it worries and becomes fault finding or gossiping.
No woman should allow her mind to grow up to such weeds. If the circumstances of her position, her education or her environment seem to make it unwise that she take up any work that would bring a monetary reward, she easily can find some charitable work that needs all the energies she can devote to it. If such a woman would take up some special branch of philanthropic work she would be amply rewarded, not only by the consciousness of the good she had done, but by the improvement in her own health and happiness.
There is another phase to this lack of nerve control shown in a nervous tension, an inability to relax and enjoy life. Some people go through the day on such a nervous tension that they are unable to take cognizance of their surroundings. Eventually this tension will manifest itself in some disorder, as headache, nervous indigestion or complete nervous prostration. In the latter case the nerves have been so abused, so strained that at last they are worn out. A rest is imperative!
A woman who, if she has a few spare moments, can lie down and relax absolutely, perhaps even drop to sleep, has a better chance to stand the stress and strain of business or of housekeeping than the one who finds it impossible to do so. Try making it a point to lie down for two or three minutes several times a day; lie flat on your back and relax every muscle; put every worry or ugly thought out of your mind by thinking some pleasant but soothing sentence as, "I am glad I can rest. I will be happy when I arise." You will be surprised at the effect these few moments a day will produce upon your health and happiness.
Plenty of sleep is imperative for these women and yet so many of them neglect this great restorer of the nervous system. Frequently these women complain of an inability to go to sleep easily, and spend long hours of the night lying awake and entertaining worry thoughts. This symptom of disordered nerves should not be neglected. A warm bath before retiring, followed by a gentle massage, especially along the spine, will, by relaxing the nerves and muscles, produce very good results. A hot foot-bath, by drawing the blood away from the brain, often will be beneficial. A glass of hot milk or cocoa taken just before retiring may have the same effect. If the sleeplessness is a result of indigestion a plain diet will relieve. Sleeping upon a hard bed without a pillow sometimes produces the desired effect. Always have plenty of fresh air in the room. Keep the mind free from the cares of the day. If they will intrude crowd them out by repeating some soothing sentence as: "There is no reason why I should not sleep, therefore, I shall sleep. My body is relaxed, my mind is at peace, sleep is coming, I am getting sleepy, I am about to sleep." Never take any sleeping powders except upon the advice of a physician, for the majority of these sleeping powders contain some harmful drug, as morphine, codeine, phenacetin or acetanilid. The latter especially is very depressing to the heart and serves to weaken the nervous system. In fact many deaths may be laid at the door of these drugs. Treatments to tone up the nervous system and to improve the circulation often are indicated in these cases of "nerves." Control your nerves, do not let them control you!