"I continued my visits to Newhampton for the space of three months. Some twenty of the youth were hopefully converted; I think I never saw converts of greater strength. But oh! what trials awaited some of this number! The first that came forward in this reformation had much persuasion to resist. Her father was an open enemy to religion, her mother was very pious, but wholly bound up in Calvinism, and the young woman was determined to be free and not be entangled with any yoke of bondage. A number of times was she threatened to be turned out of doors. She wished baptism; but being unordained I could not administer; and, as she was unable to join Mr. H.'s church, out of preference to the church of the first-born, she had to go against the current, which is never a bad sign, as dead fish invariably move along with the stream. Many wished to be baptized, and Mr. H., thinking it a good opportunity to gather additions to himself, began to raise all his forces against me, spreading defamatory reports to sour the minds of the people, intending to drive me out of the place. I was reminded of the stanza:
'They hate the Gospel preacher,
And cry out, a false teacher!
A wolf! an active creature,
Will pull our churches down.'
He found fault on several points of doctrine. We held together several conferences, public and private. He indeed stirred up the devout women and all his party to opposition, and not a little to my grief we had to say—Farewell to the reformation. He proselyted five young converts, whose happy condition, I fear, became like that of the fish which glide pleasantly down the river Jordan into the Dead Sea, which is called immediate death; for they soon grew formal and lifeless in the atmosphere of the church. 'How is the fine gold become dim!' But what of our deacon? you will say. Why this, that after falling beneath the power of God so many times, after giving me a letter of commendation extolling my character, and the power and usefulness of my ministry, after I had labored night and day, and God had visited his family in the conversion of three of his children, he 'lifted up his heel against me.' In whom then shall the Gospel minister trust? In God, and in Truth. At this declension I sorrowed with a bleeding heart. You can judge of my feelings. I gave out an appointment, administered as good advice as I knew how to the converts, preached on Sunday, took a letter of commendation signed by Elder Heart,[16] in behalf of the church, and bade them adieu. December 2, 1814."
It would seem that young Mr. Badger was not exactly a safe hand to trust with the direction of church machinery, where doctrine, devotion and preaching were respectably stereotyped, where all things were smoothly continued. His steam and individuality were rather hazardous elements in the temple of forms. "Priest Log" had been a safer priest.
He also narrates his success in Gilmanton, where several young persons and some of his own relations "bowed to the mild sceptre of mercy." His cousin, who came out in this revival, he says was the first of his relatives with whom he had felt a union in the Gospel, that as he had been educated under the theology of Calvin, he was besieged with entreaty to join them. "But," says Mr. B., "he still walks in Gospel liberty; I pray that he may be preserved blameless, and prove a thorn to the clergy whilst he lives." He compares the policy of his opponents towards his cousin to the barbarian usage of slaying prisoners when the prospect of being overcome grows certain. Extracts of other letters here follow.
"After I left Newhampton, December 2, I went to Meredith, and attended the ordination of Mr. John Swett.
Here I find a page erased, but as it is legible and very characteristic, I venture to transcribe.
"Here I was introduced by some of the brethren present for ordination. The ministers with whom I was acquainted seemed willing to ordain me, provided I would 'consent to walk on two legs,' taking the church of God for the one and the Freewill society for the other. This statement, substantially, was from Rev. E. Knowlton, of Pittsfield. This saying of Solomon immediately came to my mind, 'The legs of the lame are not equal;'[17] and considering the Freewill society as inadequate to the church of God, I concluded that, carrying out the figure, one had better go through the world hopping than limping, and I asked wherein one could be the loser, provided he went as fast on one limb as others did on two. I said to them, that if I could not have their approbation on the ground that I belonged to the church of God, without the addition of their wooden staff, I would much prefer to stand alone. They accused me of being on the common. I answered that I was born there; that I much preferred it to a barren pasture, or a pit wherein is no water; that I meant, through divine grace, to stand where I had received the Lord Jesus, and that if the church of God, unsectarianized, is the common, I would be content with it till the arrival of the time when there shall be 'one fold and one shepherd.'
"Here I had to stand alone, whilst my heart bled to see the superstition and bigotry of those who profess to be free; and, I say it reluctantly and with sorrow, I have seen as much bondage, and have met as bad treatment from those who claim to be Freewillers, as ever I did from the more stiff-necked and stoical of the sects. To have the clearest proofs of belonging to the body of Christ, of having the sanction of Him who calls men to his ministry, and to have undisputed standing among good men is not enough. Party must be worshipped. This more and more convinces me that it is well to abandon the doctrines of men and all unscriptural names, to be disciples not only in name but in practice. I am also sorry to say that I have discovered the same spirit among those who are called Christians. But I will leave this subject, praying that God will help us so to run that we may obtain."