On the morning after the first shilling instalment is received they will
COME WITH THE MILK.
Nothing can stop them. Your pavement will be blocked by them within twenty-four hours of posting your remittance, unless, of course, the coal-shoot is open. Understand this clearly, we
CANNOT TAKE THEM BACK.
Once we have got a set off our hands, threats, persuasion, tears, and entreaties are alike powerless to induce us to receive it again.
WE WANT YOUR CASH.
Secrecy Guaranteed if Required.
Conscious as we are that the acquisition of an INSIDECOMPLETUAR is tantamount to a confession of ignorance, we have made arrangements for the complete deception of the neighbours of Fellows of the Royal Society, and Members of other learned Societies. Purchasers have but to express the wish and we will express the volumes packed to simulate alien articles, such as groceries, pianos, blocks of granite, pressed beef, hardware, cork lino, Derby Brights, coffins, or the Dictionary of National Biography.
The purchaser has only to fill up and return the appended form:—
To the Proprietors of the INSIDECOMPLETUAR BRITANNIAWARE.