In order to speak grammatically, and to express yourself pleasingly, I would recommend it to you to translate often any language you are acquainted with into English, and to correct such translation till the words, their order, and the periods, are agreeable to your own ear.
Vulgarism in language is another distinguishing mark of bad company and education. Expressions may be correct in themselves, and yet be vulgar, owing to their not being fashionable; for language and manners are both established by the usage of people of fashion.
The conversation of a low-bred man is filled up with proverbs and hackneyed sayings. Instead of observing that tastes are different, and that most men have one peculiar to themselves, he will give you, ‘What is one man’s meat is another man’s poison;’ or, ‘Every one to their liking, as the old woman said, when she killed her cow.’ He has ever some favourite word, which he lugs in upon all occasions, right or wrong; such as vastly angry, vastly kind; devilish ugly, devilish handsome; immensely great, immensely little. Even his pronunciation carries the mark of vulgarity along with it; he calls the earth, yearth; finan’ces, fin’ances; he goes to words, and not towards such a place. He affects to use hard words, to give him the appearance of a man of learning, but frequently mistakes their meaning, and seldom, if ever, pronounces them properly.
All this must be avoided, if you would not be supposed to have kept company with footmen and housemaids. Never have recourse to proverbial or vulgar sayings; use neither favourite nor hard words, but seek for the most elegant; be careful in the management of them, and depend on it your labour will not be lost; for nothing is more engaging than a fashionable and polite address.
ADDRESS, PHRASEOLOGY, and SMALL-TALK.
In all good company, we meet with a certain manner, phraseology, and general conversation, that distinguish the man of fashion. These can only be acquired by frequenting good company, and being particularly attentive to all that passes there.
When invited to dine or sup at the house of any well-bred man, observe how he does the honors of his table, and mark his manner of treating his company.
Attend to the compliments of congratulation or condolence that he pays; and take notice of his address to his superiors, his equals and his inferiors; nay, his very looks and tone of voice, are worth your attention, for we cannot please without a union of them all.
There is a certain distinguishing diction that marks the man of fashion, a certain language of conversation that every gentleman should be master of. Saying to a man just married, ‘I wish you joy,’ or to one who has lost his wife, ‘I am sorry for your loss,’ and both perhaps with an unmeaning countenance, may be civil, but it is nevertheless vulgar. A man of fashion will express the same thing more elegantly, and with a look of sincerity, that shall attract the esteem of the person he speaks to. He will advance to the one, with warmth and cheerfulness, and perhaps squeezing him by the hand, will say, ‘Believe me, my dear Sir, I have scarce words to express the joy I feel, upon your happy alliance with such or such a family,’ &c. To the other in affliction, he will advance slower, and with a peculiar composure of voice and countenance, begin his compliments of condolence with, ‘I hope, Sir, you will do me the justice to be persuaded, that I am not insensible of your unhappiness, that I take part in your distress, and shall ever be affected where you are so.’
Your first address to, and indeed all your conversation with, your superiors, should be open, cheerful and respectful; with your equals warm and animated; with your inferiors, hearty, free and unreserved.