She exhibited ample concern at this intelligence. Indeed, she very nearly fainted in earnest, and Kellock, who only observed the physical shock, doubted not that it sprang from emotion entirely creditable to Medora.
“You can guess what I felt and how I tried to bring him to a better frame of mind. But he’s a different man from what he used to be. I couldn’t believe I was listening to Dingle. Changed into something outside his real character. It shows how weak natures can be influenced. Others have been getting at him—enemies to us for certain. It’s a cruel, wicked thing, and it knocked me out, as you see. But I’m not concerned with myself. I’ve got to think of you, Medora, and the future—our future. Of course, what really hurts the soul of man or woman is what they inflict upon themselves; but all the same—there it is—if he don’t divorce you, where are we?”
“Where we were,” she said, and strove to make her voice sufficiently mournful. But she guessed that it would be difficult to discuss this tremendous information without sooner or later revealing her true sentiments.
“Don’t let’s talk about it for the present,” she continued. “The future will take care of itself—it always does. For the minute, I’m only troubled about your health and happiness, Jordan. Whatever comes of this, we’ve been through a great experience, and the end of it all is this shock to your nerves.”
“‘The end of it all,’ Medora?”
“I mean, so far as we’ve got. You are the only one to think about for the minute—not me and not Dingle. The first thing is your health and strength, and I’m not going to leave you again, Jordan, till you’re set up, and find yourself as clever as ever you were.”
“If you come to the lecture, that would go a long way to quieting my nerves.”
“Of course I’ll come. I always meant to come. It was only a bit of temper saying I wouldn’t—I never thought not to come. But will you be well enough to give it?”
“Oh, yes. This flurry arose from causes outside the lecture, and quite outside the Cause. You understand?”
“Yes,” she answered. “I do understand, and I’m thankful for it, Jordan; because I know very well it means much more to you than your own trade. And our little lives are as nothing to the big things in your mind.”