Hot Mince Pie
I stood upon the coping of the tallest building known
And tried to walk that dangerous ledge, bare-footed and alone.
I started very bravely, then I turned to look behind
And saw a demon coming of the most ferocious kind;
He bade me get a move on, and I started in to run
And I slipped and lost my balance, and I knew that I was done.
I had a wild encounter with a mad and awful beast,
His eyes were bulged with malice, for he'd picked me for a feast.
I tried to scream, but couldn't. Then he growled a fearful note
And gave one spring towards me and his fangs sank in my throat,
One gulp and it was over—it was much too black to see,
But I knew beyond all question that the end had come for me.
I tumbled from an aeroplane and looped and looped around,
And was twenty-seven minutes on my journey to the ground;
I bumped a dozen steeples on my perilous descent
And left as many flagstaffs either snapped in two or bent—
But when I woke, in terror, I discovered with a sigh
How much of real excitement lurks in mother's hot mince pie.
The Laughing Boy
Always seeing the funny side,
That's the glorious way of him.
Rollin' his head, with his mouth stretched wide,
As quick to laugh as a duck to swim;
Whatever you say or whatever you do,
He'll answer you back with a chuckle or two.
Laughing from mornin' till night, it seems,
Just chock full of the gift o' fun,
An' the angels send him their comic dreams
So's he can grin for 'em every one,
An' his grandma says when he laughs her down,
He's the disrespectfullest boy in town.
Laughed at the prayer that the preacher spoke
The night Ma asked him to come for tea;
Seemed to think it was all a joke,
An' he actually winked his eye at me.
His ears are keen an' his mind is quick
An' his grin is ready for every trick.