Of all soldiers musketeers are the most lazy, for they are always at rest.
It is necessary that some rich men be dunces, because pretenders to learning may get preferment, and good wits will be able to help themselves.
Carpenters are the most civil men because they never do their business without a rule.
A hangman is the most trusty of friends, for, if he once have to do with a man, he will see him hanged before he shall want money or anything else.
Physicians have the best of it. If they do well, the world proclaims it; if ill, the earth covers it.
A man and his wife were fighting. One was asked why he did not part them, and replied, that he "had been better bred than to part man and wife."
Tobacconists (users of tobacco) would endure war well, for they would never be stifled with fire and smoke.
Fiddlers are very unfortunate in their calling, for they never do anything but it is against the hair (fiddlestring).
Smiths are the most irregular of handicrafts men, because they never think that they are better employed than when they are addicted to their vices.
It is no great matter what a drunkard says in his drink, for he never says anything that he can stand to.