The wife is not seen upon the streets with her husband. Nor does she, as a rule, eat with him. After the men of the family have finished their meals, the women take their turn at the board. Too little is the sympathy they get in their ailments; for generally scant is the attention paid to their suffering, and poverty often prevents a physician's care. Much, too, that goes for healing is hideously cruel and permeated with the wildest superstition.
It must seem the grimmest irony in one of Goldsmith's Chinese letters from his Citizen of the World, when he makes Lien Chi Altangi, while writing of his purpose to open a school for young women, say: "In this I intended to instruct the ladies in all the conjugal mysteries; wives should be taught the art of managing their husbands, and maids the skill of properly choosing them; I would teach a wife how far she might venture to be sick without giving disgust; she should be acquainted with the great benefits of cholic in the stomach, and all the thoroughbred insolence of fashion; maids should learn the secret of nicely distinguishing every competitor; they should be able to know the difference between a pedlar and a scholar, a citizen and a prig, a squire and his horse, a beau and his monkey; but chiefly they should be taught the art of managing their smiles, from the contemptuous simper to the long laborous laugh."
One of the cornerstones of Confucius's teaching was "reciprocity." But this doctrine he does not seem to apply to the practical relations of married life, about which he had little or nothing to say. Suicides of young wives would be far less frequent in China were this doctrine of the great lawgiver applied to marital life. A cruel husband may, almost with perfect impunity, greatly injure his wife, or even kill her, especially if he can make good a claim before the authorities that she had been unfilial to his parents.
The Chinese wife is, of course, not free from the evils of divorce. If she be guilty of such faults as scolding, disobedience, lasciviousness, or theft, which is next to murder in its heinousness, or if she be the victim of such misfortune as leprosy or barrenness, she may be sent back to her parents, if they be still alive. Among the causes for which divorce is possible, the failure to bear sons is the first. Widows sometimes remarry. In some parts of China the suttee, or "self-immolation," of widows is not unknown, the unfortunate woman being compelled to strangle herself, after which her body is burned.
The maternal instincts are seldom stronger than in the attitude toward the helplessness of infancy; yet, in China infanticide is of extraordinary prevalence. The greatest danger that besets a Chinese woman is at her birth. In an already overpopulated country, it is not strange that the custom of killing the female infant, for whom it is difficult to provide sustenance, should have gained ground. Besides, while the congested condition of the population is somewhat relieved by emigration of the men to other lands, the women do not leave; hence, there is a tendency toward a surplus of women. It frequently happens that if a Chinese mother has not yet been blessed with the birth of a boy, she will destroy her female offspring, with the thought that in this way she may hope the sooner to bear a son. If, on the other hand, she has one or more sons, she may allow two or three daughters to live. After this, many mothers will not hesitate to smother the girls at their birth. "By the accident of sex," says a recent writer, "the infant is a family divinity; by the accident of sex, she is a dreaded burden, liable to be destroyed, and certain to be despised." The Chinese officials have tried earnestly to break up this frightful custom of infanticide. Books have been written and circulated condemning the practice. Foundling hospitals have also been established, in order that this kind of murder might be checked and the rejected little ones cared for. Stone tablets have been erected on river banks, by pools, and in places at which the killing of girls might probably occur, or where their dead bodies are likely to be deposited. During a period of rebellion, and of dire poverty, so many desperate mothers throw their babes by the roadside for the dogs and birds of prey to devour, that "baby towers" were constructed at certain points, where the tiny dead bodies might be thrown, to avoid the dangerous offensiveness to the population.
But if in infancy the girl is not killed, she is allowed to live. Should pinching poverty come, she may be sold or given away. In some districts baby merchants are not unknown. When the little girls grow up they become serviceable in numerous ways in the domestic life; but many of them are sold to a life of shame.
A wise Chinese writer, Hwei Kwo, in discussing infanticide among his people, says: "Before you drown the infants you ought to think, 'I thus harshly violate propriety. But there are gods above; how can I deceive them? My ancestors are beside me; how can I present myself before them?' Before long the babe will call kwa, kwa, and want some nourishment; before many months she will call ya yah, and begin to talk, first calling year-niang (father, mother), and walk carefully about your knees. Before many years she will be helping you in all your hard work, and when she is married and bears a son, how very pleased you will be. If you get a good son-in-law, and their children are well to do, how much admiration and glory. 'If I endure present trouble, I may by and by eat my daughter's rice.'" But even these low and selfish motives are not sufficient to destroy the prevalence of infanticide, which is more particularly practised in southern China. It is almost, if not quite, unknown in the north.
Woman's standing before the law in China would not be regarded as high in a country where woman's rights have been agitated. Her property rights are practically nil, except as she enjoys them through male relatives. And yet, with all her limitations, the woman of China is in some respects in advance of her sisters of many other Oriental lands. She is not shut up in a harem, as she is in Turkey; she is not bound down by the harsh caste system, as in India; she is not looked upon as devoid of spiritual existence, as in Burmah; she is not degraded by the curse of polyandry, as in Thibet. In no Eastern land, with the exception of Japan, has woman a better opportunity to exert power and develop character than in China.
The dress of Chinese women might be thought by women of some other lands to be lacking in beauty and grace; and yet, it is in many respects highly sensible, being at least modest, healthful, and economical. It hides the contour of the person effectually, and this, among the Chinese, is its chief design. Being loose, it gives full play to the vital parts, as well as to the limbs, and the same thickness of materials prevails over the whole body. There is no waste in the cutting, and no unnecessary ornaments or appendages, eight yards of yard-wide goods being sufficient for a complete set of winter garments. The mental worry that comes to the woman of the West in selecting patterns, in cutting, and in fitting, is all done away with in China, since the Chinese lady always selects the same pattern,--or has had it selected for her by her great-grandmother,--and there is little need for fitting. Figures that would look unattractive in Western attire can wear the Chinese dress without disadvantage. Some have attributed the great age to which Chinese women so frequently attain--notwithstanding the often unsanitary condition of their homes, often floorless and windowless--to the hygienic character of their clothing. The winter clothes in the more northerly sections are padded garments that appear, to be sure, rather clumsy and uncomfortable. The use of woolen underclothing does not prevail. These padded garments hang about the body like bags; and sometimes when children fall down they are utterly unable to rise without assistance. It is needless to say that woman's winter attire is by no means graceful or convenient. If even the men do not use pockets,--which conveniences seem to a Westerner so indispensable,--it may be surmised that the women have no such contrivances in their dress. The ordinary costume of a woman consists of two garments. The upper one appears very much like an American lady's dressing-sack, only somewhat longer, with flowing sleeves, and is quite loose fitting, the fastenings being along a curve from the neck to beneath the right arm, and then in a straight line down that side. The lower garment is a pair of loose trousers. There is little or no difference in the style of the outer and inner garments, more or fewer being worn according to the state of the weather. A skirt is seldom worn in the Canton section, except by a bride at the time of her marriage. This custom, however, varies in different sections of China. In Shanghai, women are seldom seen without skirts. Notwithstanding the sameness and similarity of cut in Chinese costume, the quality of beauty is not entirely forgotten. A Chinese gentleman, when asked what things the Chinese women most delight in, replied: "First, beautiful clothes and ornaments with which to make themselves attractive. Secondly, to live in idleness. Thirdly, to have servants to wait upon them." The remark would suggest moral weakness which is, alas! far too common. Tsq-hia once asked Confucius what inference might be drawn from the often quoted lines:
"Dimples playing in witching smile,