(1) It must be acknowledged that artificial checks to population are for the most part very unsatisfactory: their uncertainty, their desperate matter-of-factness, so fatal to real feeling, the probability that they are in one way or another dangerous or harmful, and then their one-sideness, since here—as so often in matters of sex—the man’s satisfaction is largely at the cost of the woman: all these things are against them. One method however—that which consists in selecting, for sexual congress, a certain part of the woman’s monthly cycle, can hardly be called artificial, and is altogether the least open to the objections cited. Its success truly is not absolutely certain, but is perhaps sufficiently nearly so for the general purpose of regulating the family; and if the method involves some self-control, it does not at any rate make an impracticable demand in that direction.
(2) To adopt the method of self-control alone without regard to (1) would practically mean, in those instances where children were thought undesirable, an entire abstinence from actual intercourse, and would in most cases be making too great a demand on human nature, as well as, in some, running a possible risk of prejudice to health. No doubt the danger of prejudice to health has been greatly exaggerated; for as a rule a strong effort towards voluntary continence is one of the best safeguards of health; but it does not follow from this that complete abstinence is generally either practicable or desirable. It may, however, be said that it is in the direction of self-control rather than in the direction of unlimited “checks” that we should look for the future; and that if some effort were made towards a wise choice of the periods of congress, the general object in view would be attained without putting an inordinate strain upon the average human nature, and without necessitating recourse to doubtful and artificial devices. The effort itself, too, would lead to that Transmutation of sex-force into the higher emotional elements, of which we have spoken already, and which is such an important factor in Evolution.
I do not much doubt that, as society evolves, the sex-difficulty generally—which has been such a serious one during the civilization-period—will to a great extent subside again. As to excessive breeding (which of course does not necessarily mean excessive sex-congress) it is probably a phenomenon which marks different races during a certain period of their growth and maturity, and which passes away again. And as to excessive sex-desire, since the animals certainly do not show the inordinateness of man in this respect, there is hope for man too when he comes to his senses! A cleaner life, a cleaner diet, the habit of the open air, the growth of the mind to wider interests, the growth of Love itself—all will help. The two last-mentioned elements indeed necessarily evoke a certain effort of control over the more animal instinct—and a kind of conflict, until the two portions of the nature are brought into harmony.
APPENDIX
PAGE [7].—“Natural Reticence.”
Sex belongs to the Unconscious or universal-conscious regions of our nature (which is the meaning perhaps of Modesty), and will resume its place there some day. Meanwhile, having crept into the Conscious, it must for the time being be sincerely faced there.
PAGE [14].—“To Teach the Child First, Quite Openly, its Physical Relation to its Own Mother.”
“It was not without much anxiety that I took the first step on a road I intended to explore alone. Chance favored me. I was in Java, and amongst my servants was a dressmaker, married to the groom. This woman had a dear little baby with a velvety brown skin and bright black eyes, the admiration of my little daughter, whom I took with me to see mother and child, when the baby was a few days old. While she admired and petted it wonderingly, I said to her: ‘This pretty little baby came out of Djahid like the beautiful butterfly came out of the chrysalis, it lay close to Djahid’s heart, she made it, and kept it there till it grew. She loved it so much that she made it grow.’ Lilly looked at me with her large, intelligent eyes in astonishment. ‘Djahid is very happy to have this pretty baby. Djahid’s blood made it strong while it lay close to her heart; now Djahid will give it milk, and make it strong, till it will grow as big as my Lilly. It made Djahid ill and made her suffer when it was born, but she soon got well, and she is so glad.’ Lily listened, very much interested, and when she got home, she told her father the story, forgetting nothing. But beyond that, she did not refer again to the matter, and soon forgot all about it. The birth of Djahid’s second baby gave me the opportunity of repeating the little lesson. This time she asked some questions. I explained many things to the eager little listener, very simply, and told her that the mother kept the child within her, and took great care of it until it was old enough to endure the changes of temperature, etc., and showed her how a mother’s joy and love made her forget her pain. The little creature, suddenly remembering that she must have given her mother pain, kissed me tenderly. That was a flower of love and gratitude, which it was my happiness to see develop on the fruitful soil of truth. * * * I analyzed a flower, I pointed out to her the beauty of coloring, the gracefulness of shape, the tender shades, the difference between the parts composing the flowers. Gradually, I told her what these parts were called. I showed her the pollen, which clung like a beautiful golden powder to her little rosy fingers. I showed her through the microscope that this beautiful powder was composed of an infinite number of small grains. I made her examine the pistil more closely, and I showed her, at the end of the tube, the ovary, which I called a ‘little house full of very tiny children.’ I showed her the pollen glued to the pistil, and I told her that when the pollen of one flower, carried away by the wind, or by the insects, fell on the pistil of another flower, the small grains died, and a tiny drop of moisture passed through the tube and entered into the little house where the very tiny children dwelt; that these tiny children were like small eggs, that in each small egg there was an almost invisible opening, through which a little of the small drop passed; that when this drop of pollen mixed with some other wonderful power in the ovary, that both joined together to give life, and the eggs developed and became grains or fruit. I have shown her flowers which had only a pistil and others which had only stamens. I said to her, smiling, that the pistils were like little mothers, and the stamens like little fathers of the fruit. * * * Thus I sowed in this innocent heart and searching mind the seeds of that delicate science, which degenerates into obscenity, if the mother, through false shame, leaves the instruction of her child to its schoolfellows. Let my little girl ask me, if she likes, the much dreaded question; I will only have to remind her of the botany lessons, simply adding, ‘the same thing happens to human beings, with this difference, that what is done unconsciously by the plants, is done consciously by us; that in a properly arranged society one only unites one’s self to the person one loves.’”—(Translated from “La Revendication des Droits Feminins,” Shafts, April, 1894, p. 237.)
PAGE [16].—“The Vulgarization of Love.”
“I have found in my experience that those who seek to draw into the selfish confines of their own breasts the electric current of Love are withered by its force and passion. The energy degrades to sensualism if it has only the Individual channel for expression. The sexual expression of Love is good and beautiful if normal, but it is not so infallible as the subtler intercourse of the soul and the affections, or so satisfying as a comradeship in work for Humanity, and a mental and spiritual affinity.”—Miriam W. Nicol.