“Melville, it seems that everything I do for the discipline and safety of my crew, that man takes as a personal affront! And now over this examination matter, he’s positively insubordinate! I sent for you that we might all discuss that order in a reasonable manner, and find out what’s wrong with it, if anything is. But you saw what happened instead! Nevertheless, chief, I want your frank opinion. Is there anything wrong with that order?” De Long paused, looked anxiously at me.
“To tell you the truth, captain,” I said, “I read it only once hurriedly and then never gave it a second thought. The Navy Regulations require us all to stand an annual physical examination; what difference it makes to anyone, except to the doctor who has to do the work, if it’s monthly, I can’t see. But so long as Dr. Ambler isn’t complaining, what’s Collins blowing up about it for?”
De Long shook his head wearily.
“I don’t know, unless he can’t get it out of his head that I’m persecuting him. That hallucination of his about being a seaman started him off on it long ago. Congress wrote the law commissioning the Jeannette under which he shipped—I didn’t. He had to ship that way or not at all, but Heaven knows I’ve treated him as an officer in spite of it! A lot of good it’s done. I try to make every allowance for his point of view, but there is a limit. I can’t let him defy me on this medical examination. Even if I were so derelict in my duty as to allow discipline to be flouted by such mutinous conduct, I just can’t take chances on having a sick crew in our desperate situation!”
“Right enough, captain,” I agreed. “I should think even Collins would see that. He’s an intelligent, educated man. But I think there’s something in addition to the persecution bug that’s biting him this time. Did you catch the inflection he put on that word ‘naked’?”
“I’m afraid I was so astounded at his words, I missed his inflections,” confessed the skipper. “What about it? What’s wrong with ‘naked’ here, inflected or not? There’s not a woman within a thousand miles of us to embarrass anybody.”
In spite of the gravity of the situation, I grinned inwardly at that.
“Well, captain,” I said, “so much the worse for us. I just have an idea that’s one reason this crew’s all so glum. But that’s not what I was aiming at in Collins’ case. Women don’t enter into his ideas of embarrassment. It’s all in the way he was brought up. He’s a sensitive person, almost morbid, I’d say, and the idea of having to strip before anybody, especially under what he thinks is compulsion, gripes his ideas of dignity and personal privacy. Now, I’m not excusing insubordination, sir, but with Collins’ peculiar civilian background in this expedition, since you’ve asked for it, I’d suggest a modification of that order that’ll still get the results and not hurt anybody’s feelings. Of course the change can’t be for him alone; that would never do—but why not modify it so’s the doctor examines all the officers stripped to the waist only, and all the crew stripped completely? That’ll have two good effects. It won’t require anything of Collins that offends his dignity, and it’ll show him that he’s getting better treatment than the ‘seamen’ he’s so wrought up about being classed with. Then if anything’s ever going to clear the cobwebs out of his brain and stop his bellyaching, that’ll do it.”
To De Long, already overburdened with a sense of failure and the weight of the Arctic problems menacing us, and sincerely desirous of maintaining harmony amongst his personnel, this appealed as a sensible solution. He nodded approvingly.
“A good idea,” he agreed, expansively relaxing in his chair. “I’ll do it! And much obliged to you for the suggestion, chief. It helps a lot to feel I can always rely on you to lend a hand when there’s anything wrong, whether with the machinery or the men.”