Mr. Van Dam said that, so far as he was concerned, the matter was all right; if it wasn't, "he'd make it right."
An inquiry was made as to who would fill the office of the Higholdboy.
Mr. Spout replied. He said that their club was an anomaly. It differed in its features from any organization which had ever been made. He thought that its individual peculiarities should be kept up in the matter of the election of its presiding officers. He was in favor of self-elevation to the position, and of letting the voluntary acquiescence of the members measure the duration of individuals' tenure of office—in other words, when they got tired of him, leave him to preside over a meeting composed of himself and the furniture. "Now, gentlemen," concluded Mr. Spout, "who wants to be a Higholdboy? Don't all speak at once."
Van Dam looked at Boggs; Boggs glanced at Dropper; Dropper eyed Quackenbush, and Quackenbush turned his eyes upon Spout.
"No one speaks," said Spout, "which leads me to believe that no one desires the position unless it be myself, which I confess, gentlemen, is true. Gentlemen, I declare myself duly elevated and installed into the office of Higholdboy of the Elephant Club, and when you survey my proportions, and look at the size of that chair, I am satisfied you will concede that I am well adapted to fill it. In conclusion, gentlemen, I ask of you your coöperation in forwarding the aims and purposes of this club. Mr. Boggs, will you pass me the tobacco-box?"
"Certainly," said Boggs, as he passed the box, "and allow me to congratulate your constituency in having elevated you to so responsible a position."
"A very respectable constituency of one—Spout," said Mr. Quackenbush. "But it is very funny, isn't it?" said he.
"It's a go," said Dropper.
Mr. Van Dam was very glad that he wasn't the lucky man, as he had such an abhorrence of responsibility.
The question of the time and place of meetings was the next subject discussed. It was finally agreed to leave that matter for future consideration.