When the banns had been twice called an anonymous letter was received by the Vicar, which stated that the man was already married. Careful inquiry having proved that this was true, and that his wife and family were living in another town, the Vicar made up his mind to punish the delinquent in a novel way. The couple whose banns had been called were sent for, and Canon Hoare told the girl the whole story in her false lover’s presence. It was received with indignant incredulity, but the proofs were unanswerable. Turning upon her companion, she sobbed out, “James, James, I never believed you could have done this.” The man tried to brazen it out, and laughingly said, “Well, I suppose we need not have the banns published again?” “Indeed they shall be read again,” was the Vicar’s reply.
By this time the man was getting uncomfortable under the piercing eye that was fixed upon him, and he said, “Well, come along, Polly; it’s time for us to be going.” “Indeed it is time for you to be going,” said the Vicar, “and you had better be sharp about it too, but Polly shall not go with you.” With these words he pointed to the door, towards which the offender made with remarkable rapidity. When he was gone Mr. Hoare turned to the girl, and, taking her out on the other side of the house from that by which the man had left, bid her go home with all speed.
Next Sunday morning in the vestry Canon Hoare called the clerk aside and gave him some directions; then, having said to the curates “I’ll read the banns to-day,” he took that part of the service in which they occur. Having finished the second lesson, it was observed that in an unusually loud voice and with great distinctness he read out: “I publish the banns of marriage between James —, bachelor, and Mary Ann —, spinster, both of this parish. These are for the third time of asking. If any of you know cause or just impediment why these two persons should not be joined together in holy matrimony, ye are to declare it.” At this moment the whole congregation were electrified by a loud voice at the end of the church calling out, “I forbid the banns of James — and Mary Ann —!” “Well, come into the vestry after service and state your reasons,” was the reply.
The news fled like wild-fire over the parish, and the man got so unmercifully (yet deservedly) jeered and hooted by his fellow-workmen that he had to fly from the town. It may be added, as a curious and significant fact, that it was not the immorality of the proceeding which aroused this feeling, but “Jim — has let the parson do him out of three and sixpence, for he paid for the banns, but couldn’t get tied!”
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Another anecdote which has got into print somewhat incorrectly is the following. The parish clerk was one day in attendance at a funeral in Holy Trinity Cemetery when he noticed a gentleman walking about apparently looking for something. He accosted him, and asked if he could help him in any way. The other replied, in a very cheery and brisk way: “Yes, you can; in fact I am looking for a nice sunny place for my grave. I am going to die soon, the doctors tell me, and I want to get a pleasant place to be buried in.” The clerk was somewhat astounded at the tone and manner of the visitor, but suggested various sites. One was soon selected, and in the same cheerful way the gentleman went on, striking the ground as he spoke: “Capital, just the place; here it shall be; I shall be put in here, and that will be the end of me.” The clerk responded quietly, “Are you quite sure of that, sir? for I am not.” “Yes, quite sure,” was the answer, and then a discussion ensued between the two; when it had lasted a few minutes the official said, “Well, sir, I may not be able to convince you that you are wrong, but I know my Vicar could.” “Oh, I want none of your parsons,” said the visitor; “but who is your Vicar?” “The Reverend Edward Hoare, sir.” “Hoare, Edward Hoare—did he come from Hampstead?” “Yes, sir, I believe he did.” “How astonishing!” muttered the gentleman, and then speaking aloud, “Why, he and I were friends when we were boys!” Having asked the way to the vicarage that he might call upon him, the visitor went his way.
The meeting between the two old boyish acquaintances was very interesting, but when the gentleman stated the circumstance of his meeting with the clerk, Mr. Hoare replied, “You have made arrangements about your body; have you been as diligent about your soul?” It soon came out that, brought up, like his old friend, as a Quaker, but without his religious advantages, he had drifted into open scepticism. Now, however, the loving, earnest words that he heard made a great impression, and he begged Mr. Hoare to come and visit him.
Several weeks passed by, and one day the clerk received a message from his Vicar, “There will be an adult baptism in the service to-morrow.” His feelings can be imagined when he saw quietly standing by the font the gentleman whom he had seen in the cemetery! the defiant, cheery manner gone, but instead of that a peaceful, happy look upon his face. The illness soon progressed, but his friend of olden days visited him continually up to the end, and had the joy of knowing that he died resting happily upon his Saviour. In his will he bequeathed to Mr. Hoare the valuable proof copy of Landseer’s picture “Saved,” as a significant memento of what he had been permitted to do for his old friend.
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The writer once heard it remarked of a certain clergyman that his many curates were like so many sentinels posted over the country to warn people of the danger of approaching him! The exact reverse was the case with Canon Hoare: if any one wished to get an enthusiastic description of the Vicar, they had only to go to one of his past or present curates. He was “a hero to his valets”: so considerate and thoughtful of their wants and circumstances, and yet so vigilant about their work, knowing exactly how it was done, and never failing to notice an omission, yet doing it all so kindly. The quarter’s cheque was always enclosed in an envelope, with a slip of paper on which were written words like these, “With many thanks for all your invaluable help.”