A good man would seek far, before he would repose so large a trust in another person. The gentleman generally engages the groom after a trivial questioning. His desire is to have a servant entirely corrupt; one who asserts a knowledge how to trick animals into health. No examination is made into the real character of the applicant. A vast confidence is off-hand reposed in an individual who may be without a single moral attribute. Who deserves blame for such an abuse of responsibility? He who has been educated into knowingness, and, having become thoroughly degraded, esteems himself fully qualified for the situation he demands to fill, or he who, having the benefit of education, and being blessed with leisure for self-inquiry, shirks his duty and transfers his authority to unworthy hands?
STICKING TO A HORSE.
Every groom fancies he knows how to compound something he calls a condition ball,—that is, a certain mixture of drugs, which shall bring a living body suddenly into "tip-top" health. A bevy of companions are invited to see "Jim give a ball." They duly arrive, and part of the horse's tongue is speedily made to protrude from the mouth, this portion being firmly held by "Jim's" free hand. The condition ball is in "Jim's" other hand, and the exhibition consists in the marvelous adroitness with which the ball can be introduced between the animal's jaws. The horse soon sympathizes with the excitement that surrounds it. Jim, "quick as lightning," makes a thrust with the ball, whereupon the startled animal raises the head and retreats. "Stick to him, Jim!" "stick to him!" shout the visitors. Jim does stick to him until his hand is covered with blood, or, without quitting its gripe, suddenly loses the resistance, which constituted its hold. Should it be the former, the frœnum of the tongue is ruptured, and a wetted sponge soon clears the hand of the groom as well as the mouth of the horse. A general curse and a kick under the belly of the rebellious steed end the amusements for one day. Should it be the latter, Jim finds the larger portion of the quadruped's tongue left in his hand. This is an awful accident. The blood is wiped off, and the groom next morning goes to his master with, "Please, sir, see what 'Fugleman' has done in his sleep!"
A farmer engages a pretty-looking stable boy. The young scamp is sufficiently a groom to glory in nothing so much as deception. The farmer, however, takes this pretty boy to the fair, where an additional horse is purchased. With the new "dobbin" the boy is entrusted, being cautioned to lead it gently home. With numerous protestations boy and horse depart, but have barely reached the suburbs before the knowing youngster stops "dobbin," and, twisting the halter in "a chaw," leads the animal to the nearest gate, where the lad climbs upon its back.
"A chaw" is the slang short phrase for something to chew. This is made by twisting the halter into the animal's mouth so as to encircle the jaw. In this position the rope is thought by some knowing people to answer the purposes of a bridle. To this rope the boy hangs, rolling to either side; now, nearly off—and now, jerked from his seat, as "dobbin," after repeated urgings, starts off into the lazy pretense at a trot.
Anything inserted into a horse's mouth provokes the curiosity of the animal. It is felt and poked about with the tongue, till at last the lingual organ is, by the exercise of much ingenuity, inserted beneath the obstacle. In this state of affairs, "dobbin" and the pretty boy finish the latter half of the journey. The youngster laughing, as the rough action of the horse bumps him up and down, he all the time dragging at the halter. Before home is reached, night has set in; the boy dismounts, and with all the simplicity his face can assume leads "dobbin" to the homestead.
The boy is protesting about being so very tired after his long walk, when the horse's mouth is discovered to be stained with blood. The youthful expression of surprise exceeds that of the elder's. Next the halter is found to be rich with the same fluid. The horse's mouth is then opened, it is full of blood, and the tongue nearly cut through. Accusations are made against the lad; at first they are replied to with defiance; at last they are propitiated with tears, drawn forth by the idea of honesty being suspected. Youthful knowing, however, is not in the long run a match for the self-interest of age; and perseverance is rewarded by a full confession.
"The chaw" is an artifice recognized in every stable. Grooms have their tastes. It is very unpleasant to these gentry when they behold some unmannerly horse hang back in the halter. Stalls are drained into a main channel, situated at the edge of the gangway. The pavement on which the animal stands consequently slants from the manger to the footpath. This nice arrangement obliges the horse always to stand with the toes in the air and throws the weight of the body upon the back sinews. To ease its aching limbs the animal is apt to go to the extent of its rope, so as to place the hind feet upon the gangway, and even occasionally to give the toe an opposite direction by allowing it to sink into the open drain. Such presumption horrifies the groom's sense of propriety. The ignorant mind's idea of beauty is "everything to match." He thinks all is so nice when the animals dress to a line, like soldiers on parade. To have this line preserved, even in his absence, he puts "a chaw" into the refractory "brute's" mouth. This chaw is to be preserved night and day. The tongue soon gets under the rope. Timidity is rendered yet more fearful by persecution. The voice of the groom has become a terror to the quadruped. It hangs back for ease, and is surprised by the vehement exclamation of the tormentor. Back goes the neck and up goes the head. The animal runs to its manger, but something has fallen upon the floor! The horse was luxuriating in hanging back to the full extent when surprised. The sudden start jerked the halter rein, and the result is the free portion of the tongue falls from the mouth, severed by the rope.