It often happens that the parents of both parties make up the match; and among several peoples the man pays his suit by proxy. But these instances are of no particular importance.
In most animal species courtship takes place in nearly the same way. During the season of love, the males even of the most timid animals engage in desperate combats with each other for the possession of the female, and she, although comparatively passive, nevertheless often exercises a choice, selecting one of the rivals. This fighting for a female occurs even among insects,[930] and is of universal prevalence in the order of the Vertebrata. We may, with Haeckel, regard it as a modification and a special kind of the struggle for existence.[931]
There can be no doubt that our primeval human ancestors had, in the same way, to combat for their brides. Even now this kind of courtship is far from being unknown. Speaking of the Northern Indians, Hearne states that “it has ever been the custom among those people for the men to wrestle for any woman to whom they are attached; and, of course, the strongest party always carries off the prize. A weak man, unless he be a good hunter and well-beloved, is seldom permitted to keep a wife that a stronger man thinks worth his notice.... This custom prevails throughout all their tribes, and causes a great spirit of emulation among their youth, who are upon all occasions, from their childhood, trying their strength and skill in wrestling.[932] Richardson also saw, more than once, a stronger man assert his right to take the wife of a weaker countryman. “Any one,” he says, “may challenge another to wrestle, and, if he overcomes, may carry off his wife as the prize.... The bereaved husband meets his loss with the resignation which custom prescribes in such a case, and seeks his revenge by taking the wife of another man weaker than himself.”[933] With reference to the Slave Indians, Mr. Hooper says, “If a man desire to despoil his neighbour of his wife, a trial of strength of a curious nature ensues: they seize each other by the hair, which is worn long and flowing, and thus strive for the mastery, until one or another cries peccavi. Should the victor be the envious man, he has to pay a certain number of skins for the husband-changing woman.”[934]
Among the Californians also, conflicting claims sometimes arise between two or more men in regard to a woman; and, among the Patwin, it occasionally happened that men who had a quarrel about a woman fought a duel with bows and arrows at long distances.[935] In Mexico, a duel often decided the conflict between two competing suitors.[936] Among the Guanas, according to Azara, the men frequently do not marry till they are twenty years old or more, as before that age they cannot conquer their rivals.[937] Among the Muras, the wives are most commonly gained in a combat with fists between all the lovers of the girl; and the same is the case with the Passés.[938]
Among the Australian aborigines, quarrels are perhaps for the most part occasioned by “the fair sex.”[939] Speaking of the natives near Herbert Vale, Northern Queensland, Herr Lumholtz says that, “if a woman is good-looking, all the men want her, and the one who is most influential, or who is the strongest, is accordingly generally the victor.”[940] Hence, the majority of the young men must wait a long time before they get wives, as they have not the courage to fight the requisite duel for one with an older man.[941] In the tribes of Western Victoria, described by Mr. Dawson, a young chief who cannot get a wife, and falls in love with one belonging to a chief who has more than two, can, with her consent, challenge the husband to single combat, and, if the husband is defeated, the conqueror makes her his legal wife.[942] Narcisse Peltier, who, during seventeen years, was detained by a tribe of Queensland Australians, states that the men “not unfrequently fight with spears for the possession of a woman.”[943]
In New Zealand, if a girl had two suitors with equal pretensions, a kind of “pulling match” was arranged in which the girl’s arms were dragged by each of the suitors in opposite directions, the stronger man being the victor;[944] and, according to the Rev. R. Taylor, there is in the Maori language even a special term for denoting such a struggle.[945] In Samoa, as also in the Fiji Islands, women have always been one of the chief causes of fighting;[946] and of the natives of Makin, of the Kingsmill Group, Mr. Wood assures us that “they have no wars, and very few arms, and seldom quarrel except about their women.”[947]
Among the South African Bushmans, the “stronger man will sometimes take away the wife of the weaker.”[948] The people of Wadaï are notorious for their desperate fights for women; and, among the young men of Baghirmi, bloody feuds between rivals are far from being of rare occurrence.[949]
In the islands outside Kamchatka there prevailed formerly a very curious custom, as reported by Steller. If a husband found that a rival had been with his wife, he would admit that the rival had at least an equal claim to her. “Let us try, then,” he would say, “which of us has the greater right, and shall have her.” After that they would take off their clothes and begin to beat each other’s backs with sticks; and he who first fell to the ground, unable to bear any more blows, lost his right to the woman.[950]
Among the ancient Hindus, says Mr. Samuelson, “it was a custom in royal circles, when a princess became marriageable, for a tournament to be held, and the victor was chosen by the princess as her husband.” This custom was known as the “Swayamvara,” or “Maiden’s Choice,” and it is often mentioned in the ancient legends.[951]