Tom ain't a bad husband, as husbands do go;
(That ain't saying much, as I daresay you know)
But there's one thing that puts him and me out o' gear—
He's always a craving for one glass of Beer.
He never gets drunk, but he's always half-fuddled;
He wastes all his time, and his wits are all muddled;
"We've notice to quit for next Michaelmas year—
All owing to Tom and his one glass of Beer!"
MORAL.
My friends, I believe we shall none of us quarrel
If I try from this story to draw out a moral;
Tom Smith, I am told, has now taken the pledge;
Let us hope he will keep the right side of the hedge.
But because men like Tom find it hard to refrain,
It's hard that we temperate folk should abstain;
Tea and coffee no doubt are most excellent cheer
But a hard-working man likes his one glass of Beer.
What with 'chining [2] and hoeing and ploughing and drill,
A glass of good beer will not make a man ill;
But one glass, like poison, you never must touch—
It's the glass which is commonly called one too much!
[1] Muddle.
[2] Machining, i.e. threshing by machinery.