“That is why I looked upon you with respectful awe,” he answered. “I heard that the Pope’s brother said you have superhuman power, and I believe his saying is true.”
“No,” I returned “I have no superhuman power. Only I inferred that such a thing must happen. So I have made what I thought preparation against it.”
Tsa Rong-ba, who followed a peculiar kind of reasoning, protested: “No, do not say so; I know you heard the conversation between the caravan chief and the Pope’s brother by some mysterious means. Otherwise how would you come down to our house on such an occasion as this? But then why have you not been kind enough to call on us a little earlier? We could not sleep at all last night. But are you really going to present to the Pope the letter you have written to him? In doing so, you little think of what will become of us. I doubt not you are a venerable Lama, but the Pope’s brother is by no means a good-natured man. We cannot tell what he is going to say to the Pope, and if the Pope listens to him who can tell the result? But I feel sure we must suffer, don’t you think so?”
“I cannot tell,” said I, “what I shall do until I try samāḍhi (go into abstract contemplation). For the present I can only tell you that there are four things to be considered in the ‘silent contemplation’. They are as follows:
(1) If the presentation of my letter to the Pope does not do any harm to you, the Minister of the Treasury, and the Sera monastery, I will present the letter though I should suffer from doing so, for I am the only Japanese who has visited this country, and I think it would be very sad to leave this country without telling the people who I am, and what I have come for.
(2) If the presentation of my letter causes any harm to any of you, I will not present it, though I myself am free from danger.
(3) If I can go to India without giving notice to the Pope, and it does not cause any harm to any of my acquaintances, I will go to India directly.
(4) If the presentation of my letter would cause any harm to them after my departure, I will stay here and present the letter, because if it is the cause of evil whether I stay here or not, it is my duty to stay here and share the evil with my acquaintances to whom I have caused it. I will never be the only one to escape from danger. If I come to the conclusion by the contemplation that there will be no evil caused after my departure, I will leave this country. But as I am not fully contented with my own decision on my own account, I will go to my teacher Ganden Ti Rinpoche and consult with him. Of course I shall not say that I am a Japanese, nor that I am going back for that reason, but I will say that I must go on a pilgrimage and ask him his judgment whether my departure is advantageous for many people who are suffering; and if his judgment agrees with mine I will adopt it, and if not, I will go and ask the same of the Lama of Tse-Moeling, and if the latter’s judgment be the same as my teacher’s I will follow it, but if it agrees with mine, I shall follow that.”
The husband and wife, who were listening to me attentively, interrupted me here and told me that I needed not to ask another’s opinion; my own judgment would be good enough to be acted upon.