First day, the 27th. My mind was solemnly exercised during the greater part of our meeting, and deeply impressed with the spirit of prayer and supplication. Oh, how awful is the prospect of approaching the Majesty of heaven in solemn prayer! How it reduces the creature, and shows him his entire unworthiness and helpless state. Well might the prophet thus exclaim: “When I heard, my belly trembled; my lips quivered at the voice; rottenness entered into my bones, and I trembled in myself, that I might rest in the day of trouble.” As I sat under the humbling prospect, I was strengthened, towards the close of the meeting, with a bowed down mind and bended knees, to address my humble petition, on behalf of myself and my friends, to the throne of grace, expressive of the desire of my soul, that we might be kept, both old and young, at all times, under an humbling sense of the divine fear, as that on which all our safety and preservation depends.
Second and third days. I spent with a family of my friends some distance from home, my wife accompanying me. I had been for some time under considerable exercise and concern on account of some uneasiness and disunity which subsisted among them, greatly to their hurt. I entered fully into the subject, and was favoured, through patient perseverance, to bring matters to a peaceful close, for which I was thankful, as the harmony of the family had been for several years very much interrupted.
Fourth day. We returned home.
Fifth day. Attended our meeting held this day, in which I was silent.
Sixth day. I spent principally in assisting a friend, who was somewhat straitened in getting along with his husbandry concerns; he having been indisposed.
Seventh day. Attended the funeral of a very ancient woman Friend, an elder in society. She lived to the age of ninety-seven years, an example of prudence and plainness; of an innocent life and conversation, and generally beloved by her acquaintance. A large collection of Friends and others attended it. I was led to set forth the great advantages the true believer has over the unbeliever; and to show to the people the great necessity of care that we did not place any confidence in a mere traditional or historical belief, without coming to a real experimental knowledge of God and Christ. It was a solemn time; many hearts were tendered with the savour of truth, that spread over the meeting.
First day, the 3d of 9th month. Feeling a small draft of love and concern to sit with Friends of Westbury meeting to-day, I yielded thereto. It proved rather a low dull season, very little life felt to be stirring in the meeting; but a little before the close, I felt my mind quickened with the remembrance of the occurrence which took place with Jesus and his disciples a short time previous to his being taken prisoner, and carried before Pilate; but, in a particular manner, my mind was impressed with the proceedings of Judas the traitor. It opened on my mind that he was a true figure of self in man, which is the son of perdition, and man of sin. I was led, in the opening, to warn Friends to beware of him, each one in themselves, for otherwise he would deceive, and betray them, as Judas did his Master; and who will as certainly destroy the precious life in us, as he brought Christ to his crucifixion; his delight is to scatter and expose to trial and temptation. It spread with weight over the meeting, and many minds were solemnly affected. Surely the Lord’s mercy is still great towards his backsliding people, as he continues striving to gather and preserve them from all evil.
The rest of the week I spent as usual, nothing particular occurring.
First day, the 10th. This day I was pretty closely engaged. Attended our own meeting in the morning, and an appointed meeting at Jerusalem in the afternoon. Both were meetings of favour, and comforting seasons to the upright in heart.
Second day. Visited a sick brother. Found him very ill, his case being such as to render his recovery very doubtful. It caused much distress in the family. Oh! how wise it is for such dependant creatures as we are, and whose stay here is so uncertain, to be always in a state of readiness to meet every event. What consolation it affords in such trying seasons, when we can come to say, Lord, thy servant is ready.