“There is where your knowledge will be most useful,” broke in the girl with the dimple in her chin; “you can bring it out to prove that times are not hard, and run off a lot of statistics to prove your point.”
“But I don’t know any statistics,” wailed the girl with the Roman nose.
“I’m afraid you have not been paying strict attention to-day,” said the president, gravely. “However, if you are in danger of losing in an argument, be sure to say, with a smile of superiority, ‘I suppose you know what the statistics are?’ Now, people are not in the habit of carrying statistics around, like cough-drops, and they will simply give up the battle on the spot. If they don’t, rattle off a lot of figures; they can’t refute them immediately, and if they attempt to do it afterward, you can just say, in a supercilious tone, ‘I thought we settled that matter yesterday.’”
“Well, I declare,” said the girl with the Roman nose, “that is just my own father’s line of argument, and yet it never occurred to me that I could imitate it. I do hope you will take very good care of your health, Evelyn,” she added. “People who are very intellectual are so apt to die young.”
“I shall,” said the president. “I’ve no notion of dying and having Tom a widower while he is still young enough to be attractive. It would not make so much difference after that, for I shall take care that he does not accumulate enough money to make him fascinating at seventy-five!”
“Dear, dear,” sighed the blue-eyed girl, “I wonder why so few men have money until their hair is only a memory!”
“Case of the wind being tempered to the shorn lamb,” said the girl with the dimple in her chin; “after all, a man must sacrifice something on the altar of success.”
“Humph; isn’t it usually his wife?” said the girl with the classic profile.
“Not if she is clever,” said the girl with the eyeglasses. “Girls, I once knew a woman whose husband made a fortune in two years, and he wouldn’t give her more than the merest pittance for dress and entertaining. In fact, the only bills he would pay, without grumbling, were those of the doctor. And what do you think she did? She selected the doctor whose bills were the most outrageous, and settled herself to be a chronic invalid. She said she was determined to get something out of her husband’s fortune.”
“Good,” said the girl with the dimple in her chin; “I do hope she really enjoyed herself after that.”