If there could be such a thing as laughing in a matter of such general importance to human kind as the fixing of this point, there could hardly be any refraining from it, with regard to the conduct of the men-midwives, especially in Paris. There the novices of them, sensible of the natural defect there must be in men-practitioners, apply for improvement to the regular midwives. There is particularly, among others, one Madam Clavier, who, when I knew her, lived in the Rue de St. André, that gave lessons, at so much a-head, to the men-students of midwifery. Yet these same men have no sooner got a smattering of all that is valuable in the profession, for beyond a practical smattering at most nature refuses them further progress; they, I say, have no sooner acquired a little useful insight from these laudably communicative midwives, but they are the first to swell the cry against them of, “oh these ignorant midwives!”——or “what can be expected from a woman?” And what is more yet, among women it is, that they can make this equally ungrateful and false clamor prevail. And women, in a point of the utmost importance to themselves, prove that the men have, in fact, not quite a wrong idea of their weakness, since they are weak enough to countenance a notion, that so unjustly dishonors them in every sense. But that is not enough. What one should imagine, women especially would consider, is that this notion received with its consequential exclusion of those of their own sex, tends to have their own pains aggravated, and the safety not only of themselves but of their so naturally dear children, yet more endangered.
For the truth of this increase of pain and danger from the practice of the instrumentarians, it is not to any representations from me only, who may be supposed too interested a party, but to reason, and even to reason’s best mistress, Nature herself, that I appeal. I appeal even to the very writings of the most celebrated men-midwives themselves, to which I would refer all who are sincere enough with themselves to be resolved to embrace truth when discovered to them. It is then even in the writings of those men-practitioners, that a lover of truth might find enough to satisfy himself, that all the mighty pretences of the men-midwives to superiority of skill and practice to the women are false and absurd. Look into Deventer, Peu, La Motte, Mauriceau, Levret, Smellie, &c. and you will find that, except their accounts of the innocent manual function, in which midwives must so much excel them; except their pernicious practical part, on which they so tediously insist, by way of recommending each some particular instrument that is to usher him into employment, and increase his profit, in which noble view he takes care to decry the instruments of all others, or at least prefer his own; except the scientific jargon of hard Latin and Greek words, so fit to throw dust in the eyes of the ignorant, and give their work an air of deep learning; except what they have pillaged from regular physicians and surgeons, who have treated upon these matters: except in short all the quacking verboseness of the various histories of their exploits and deliverances of distressed women, and you will find the merit of their whole works shrink to little or nothing, under the appraisement of common sense and true practical knowledge. The most that you will find in them, is, hard or lingering labors, oftenest precipitated fatally to the mother, or at least to the child; they hardly, you may be sure, carrying their candor so far, as always to mention when it has proved so to both; of which however the tenor of their practice with instruments gives you but too much room to presume the probability. In short those cases, of which their works are chiefly patched up, are little better than so many quack-advertisements; and their best exploits therein recounted not a whit preferable; nor indeed so practically just, as what would appear in the common daily practice of a regular well-bred midwife, that should keep a register of her deliveries. There might not indeed appear so much anatomy in her descriptions, but, I am very sure, there would be couched in them much more solid instruction. Not that I therefore have not the highest deference to the true physicians, the true surgeons. But as far as I can presume to judge, it is not in the works of the men-midwives, that the best lights in midwifery are to be looked for. They are themselves for every thing that is worth reading in their writings indebted, both to the physicians and surgeons, whose arts they have despised enough to think, they may be well enough learnt collaterally and subordinately to the mechanical operation of midwifery, as well as obliged to the midwives, to whom they ought at least to go to school, tho’ sure to rail at their ignorance the minute after being taught by them. In short, the most valuable lights thrown into this subject are undoubtedly furnished by those great men Boerhave, Haller, Heister, the great Harvey, and other the like excellent physicians and surgeons, not one of whom however, I presume, in the way of making a trade of it, ever delivered a woman in his life.
Nay! was any accident requiring a chirurgical operation to befall a pregnant woman, I should think the application would be more safely made to a thorough regular-bred surgeon, than to one of the common run of these men-midwives; and the exceptions are so few, they are hardly worth making. The reason too for such a preference is obvious and natural. A regular surgeon probably would not only be more consummately skilful and expert in his general notions, both theoretical and practical, so far as surgery was in the question, but would not, from any thing only partial in his profession, have the same temptation of bringing into play a horrid apparatus of murderous instruments, to show the importance and utility of that anatomical midwifery of theirs, all the art of which consists in the violences it offers to Nature. What would be to be done, the true surgeon could hardly do worse than the pragmatical man-midwife, and most probably would perform it much more artistlike, except perhaps in the sole point of striking a crotchet into the brain-pan of a live-child, or needlessly tearing open, with iron and steel, parts so tender and so delicate, as hardly to bear the touch of even the softest hand, guarded with all precaution. He would not, in short, be so forward to use means destructively dangerous to both mother and child, and at the best often to ruin a woman for being a mother for ever after.
Upon the whole then, if any one will dare give his own understanding fair play, against the powers of prejudice and interested imposition, it cannot but, on a fair examination satisfy him, that that strange anomalous complex creature of the three arts, physic, surgery and midwifery, is most likely to excel in neither. It may by great chance be an indifferent physician; IT must be in this respect a dangerous surgeon, but IT can never be any thing but a despicable midwife; or if that favorite name of accoucheur, IT is so fond of assuming, should not be popular enough from its gallicism, let IT change it for the Latin one of Pudendist: a word of not one jot a more pedantic coinage than Dentist, or Oculist, but of which moreover the propriety of the sound may somewhat atone for the pitiful play of words it contains, and which can yet scarcely be more pitiful than the object of its application.
Objection the Twelfth.
It is not probable, that the men-practitioners would have come into the vogue in which we see them, if numbers of instances were not to be produced in their favor, of their having terminated happily many labors, in which they have been preferably employed, and to the exclusion of the midwives.
ANSWER.
This only proves, what none in their senses will deny, that the greater part of the cases of labor are so mild, that not even that faultiness of the men-practitioners, which is palpably owing to an incurable imperfection of Nature, not, in short, all that is bungling or deficient in their preliminary disposition and manual operation, can absolutely frustrate the kindness of that Nature, of which these intruders are not ashamed of assuming the honor. But that inference of the men in favor of themselves is as ridiculous as it is false. In those cases of labor, which are much the less frequent, and require no extraordinary assistence, the utmost of the real merit of these bunglers is only of the negative kind: that is to say, they have not destroyed the mother nor the child; and indeed, every thing considered, great is the praise to them thereof. It is not always, even in naturally easy labors, that the women who employ men to lay them have not a harder bargain of them.
But even in these propitious labors, the mischief done to a lying-in woman, by employing of a man to the exclusion of a midwife, is not a small one, if pain is an evil, and the lessening that evil a desirable good. For certainly there can hardly be a case of lying-in supposed, in which some labor-pains are not felt. The bringing forth children in pain, stands hitherto the irreversible decree of nature, from which few women can promise themselves a total exemption. But these pains, if they cannot be entirely spared, to the lying-in woman, will always admit of actual or preventive alleviation. That alleviation can be no inconsiderable object to women, who are by their nature so tender and so impatient of pain. Even then in the prospect and presence of the very gentlest labors, there are two natural points to be respectively attended to. The one is the predisposition of every thing, according to art, so as to render the expected labor-pains as moderate as possible. The second is in the manual function, at the actual crisis of the delivery. Now, in both these points, for reasons above-deduced of the superior aptitude in women derived to them from Nature herself, a woman may reasonably depend not only on a more simpathizing cherishment, but a more efficacious assistence from those of her own sex. There are a thousand little tender attentions suggested by nature, and improved by experience, that a midwife can employ both preventively and actually to the mitigation of her charge’s pain; attentions which, if even they ever entered into a man-midwife’s head, could not be accepted but with repugnance, I will not say only by a modest woman, but by any woman at all. And the truth is, that there can be few men in the world, but what, the more tender lovers they are of the women, but must be only the more disgusted, the more impatient of the midwife’s preparatory part of her office, which is however the most important one, both as to the prevention of pain, and to the safety of the delivery.
But even where those preparatory offices have been omitted, or at best perfunctorily performed by a man-midwife, and where the actual function in the crisis of labor has been deficient, or at best indifferent, the labor may still have proceeded, and the patient delivered with only more pain, than she would probably have suffered under a good midwife’s hands. What follows then? Why this; that the patient in the transport of joy at her delivery from pains which are hardly ever but great, even though much less than her fear had magnified them to her; instead of gratitude to that Nature, which can constitute to her only a vague object of the mind, her weak imagination gives to the assistent man-midwife, a more palpable being, as he is of flesh and blood, the merit of a deliverance, in which he had most probably no other share, than its being his fault that it was not yet less painful than she has found it. But this is not at all. What sounds towards a paradox, and yet is strictly true, is, that the more pain the patient has endured, through the man-midwife’s fault, the greater will her gratitude be to him. The reason is as obvious as it is natural. Herself not knowing, nor having perhaps any idea of what ought to have been done for her more perfect relief, she will have no conception that the man has omitted any thing: she will give him credit for what he has appeared to do for her; and measure her sense of acknowledgement by the pain from which she will suppose he has helped to rid her; and in her joy at her delivery would think it even an ingratitude to listen to suggestions from others, or even from herself, that should tend to diminish, explain away, or may be reduced to less than nothing, the benefit she so vainly imagines was his work.