‘Poor George Eliot. She had a passionate nature, and she came into circumstances so sad. Her life is a great sorrow to those who feel that her teaching was in some way noble, though in others it was really weakening. He who knows all will judge her: “Whose mercy endureth for ever.” She was a long way above Lewes. If you come across Hutton’s Essays you ought to read them. I always get a good bit of reading in the holidays that demands thought....’
To the same:—
‘May 1883.
‘I am glad you find the work comforting again, and that God has sent you help through some one else. Don’t fret and look forward to next holidays, you don’t know yet how full of blessing they may be. Just remember it is a command, “Be not anxious for to-morrow,” and so we can obey. I remember once that thought that I must stay seemed the only thing to save me from breaking down, and so failing to do as I ought the work God had given me. See that it is a sin to fret and be anxious about your father’s health, or your future relations to home, or anything. We have to do our best, and then trust to Him “who ordereth all things according to the counsel of His Will.”
‘Then as regards past sins. It seems to me that it enervates you to dwell upon them as you are doing. I may be wrong, but it seems to me that the sense of guiltiness in the past makes you afraid of God, as you ought not to be. If a child were ever so naughty to you, did ever so many wrong things to you, would it shut her out from your love? You know it would not; you would sorrow over her, and seek to do her good. Only her continuing naughty, continuing to hate and distrust you, could prevent your doing her good. “Ye are not straitened in God, but in your own heart.” “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us.” We can’t think of Him not forgiving us, without thinking of Him as less good than He is, and He is infinitely good. Of course this does not mean that He will not give us due discipline for our past failures, in order that we may be healed of the sins which caused them; but then we are glad of this, it is only a sign of His love for us.
‘We should confess to Him because He is judge, i.e. He separates and enables us to discern, distinguish the good from the evil in us, and separate. One whom I have often quoted to you said, “I forbid you to look at your sins except at the foot of the Cross.” Do you do this sometimes? The consciousness of guilt would be hardening without the consciousness of the abounding love. This purifies. I wonder if I have met your thought....’
To the same:—
‘May 1883.
‘You say you don’t know what to pray for. I think, perhaps, you are praying too exclusively for yourself. Ask for God’s grace, and power to respond. Intercede much for your children, your relations, your father, teachers and friends, and any one whom God gives you the means of helping. Especially at Holy Communion pray for the Church and all who are separated by darkness from one another, and put yourself quietly in God’s Hands. Some of our collects help me; one Mr. Wilkinson was so fond of: “Who knowest our necessities before we ask,” etc. etc.: do you know it? I think of Him then as coming to us all in Holy Communion, and from His own Hands giving us the pledges of His love, to make us know He is giving us His own glorified Life; the Life of God in such a way that we can receive it,—emptying Himself in Christ of that glory which we can’t know: the Absolute Being, the Infinite we cannot conceive. We must trust His word ... and this faith makes us strong, saves us from sickness, delivers us from the power of sin; yes, though we fall again and again, enables us to arise.
‘I so want you not to have that crushing fear, which, I may be wrong, but I think, you sometimes feel of God. He must be so sorry, if we don’t understand Him and feel like that.... “I fell at His feet as dead, and He laid His hand on me, saying, Fear not.” Think of this and of the parting words, “Peace be unto you.”’