Two days afterwards Princess Augusta sent for me, and as I was sitting with her, one of her dressers entered the room with a birdcage in her hand, and her fingers in her eyes. “Princess Amelia,” she said, “gave orders before her death that this bird should be returned to your royal highness; but not on the day she died, nor the day after, that it might not afflict you too much in the first hours of your grief. But she wished you to know how much she was obliged to you for giving it to her, and what a comfort its sweet voice had been.”
Two ladies sat up with the corpse every night until the time of the funeral. I was directed to perform this duty one night with Lady George Murray.[[105]] We were in a room adjoining that in which was the coffin, with the doors open. On the table was a book, which had been a favourite with Princess Amelia. It was Tillikeper’s “Thoughts on Religious Subjects,” and many of them had a pencil mark. The passages thus distinguished testified to the feelings and judgment of the Princess, and I asked leave to transcribe them into the copy of that work which she herself had given to me.
The King recovered sufficiently to be told of her death, and he arranged everything relating to the ceremony of the funeral. It appeared, indeed, that before his late serious attack he had made some preparations for this event, although, in the wanderings of his imagination, he could not think her in danger. However this might be, the matter was settled very properly. One of the Queen’s ladies was to go as chief mourner,[[106]] followed, of course, by others belonging to the Princesses; but, although I had no engagement of that kind, the King chose that I should have a place in the procession, knowing how sincerely I was attached to the Princess. I also heard that when lying on her death-bed, that the two persons whom the Princess most warmly recommended to her father, were Mrs. Williams—who had been her nurse, and was then attending her—and myself. I was also named amongst the few persons to whom she desired that remembrances should be given.
For the anthem the King had selected a passage from the sixteenth Psalm, which used to be often sung by the Princess and her father. The conclusion,[[107]] “In thy presence is gladness, and fulness of joy,” raised my spirits from the depression into which they had fallen; and, when I returned home, gave me a better night’s rest than I had enjoyed for some time.
CHAPTER XI.
STATE OF THE COURT—THE REGENCY—PRINCESS OF WALES—PRINCESS CHARLOTTE—ARRANGEMENTS FOR THE EDUCATION OF THE PRINCESS—MISS KNIGHT BECOMES LADY COMPANION.
The amendment in the state of the King’s mind was only temporary. From this time he was lost to his family and to his subjects; but his name was still held sacred—he was still beloved and respected. Among the aberrations of his mind there was one which must greatly have contributed to his comfort. He fancied that Princess Amelia was not dead, but living at Hanover, where she would never grow older, and always be well. He endeavoured to impart the same consolation to one of his physicians, who was lamenting the loss of his wife, by telling him that she was not dead, but living at Hanover with Amelia.
I did not quit Windsor even for a day during the remainder of the winter. The drawing-rooms were suspended, and even at the Castle the Queen only received her family, and the persons attached to her service, in her private apartments. Very early in the spring her Majesty, perceiving that I had a very bad cold and cough, insisted on my going into Devonshire, where I was invited to stay with Lord and Lady Rolle till they came to town. The weather was beautiful, and my health was gradually restored.
The autumn of 1811 was particularly fine. The comet[[108]] made a magnificent appearance, and seemed to clear the atmosphere from storms and rain.