“When her words were very sharp and bitter, and I could stand them no longer, I used to take my hat and walk out, and never come back till night. And she—poor mother!—she would have a nice, hot supper waiting for her prodigal son, with some extra luxury that she could ill afford added to the feast.”
“An’ she was a good craychur, be that same token,” exclaimed Mike.
“Yes, she was good—very good—but I tired her beyond her patience. One day the crisis came; the rent was behindhand; the bailiff was threatening; there seemed danger of an eviction. Then my mother, in her grief and anger, turned on me, said that if it had not been for my worthlessness the farm would have been prosperous. She had said that so often before that the words had lost all significance to me. But she ended in saying this:
“‘If it hadn’t been for you, Samson, I shouldn’t ha’ been brought to this disgrace and poverty. The cost of keeping you in idleness would have paid an able-bodied farm laborer, who would have kept the place in order. And now I tell you, if you can’t work here, you had better go and find employment somewhere else to suit you.’”
“Faix, it was harrd on ye,” said Mike.
“It was, though she did not mean it. She was half crazy with the trouble that I might have warded off from her. But, boys,” added Longman solemnly, “her words fell on me stinging, burning, smarting, humiliating as a lash laid on a naked back. Without a word I took up my hat and walked out of the house, as I had often done before on other but less bitter occasions; only this time I did not return. That was five years ago. I have never seen my mother since.”
A solemn silence fell on the trio.
Presently old Dandy inquired:
“An’ where did ye go thin? Ye couldn’t hev hed mooch money in yer pocket, if there was none to pay the rint.”
“No, I had not a shilling. I walked into Chuxton, sold my silver watch for all it would bring, and then took a third-class ticket in the cheap parliamentary train to London, shipped as an able-bodied seaman on board the Auro, bound from St. Katherine’s Docks to the Golden Gate.”