Καὶ τὰ πρὸ τούτου δὲ ὁποῖός τις γέγονα περὶ αὐτὸν ἐντεῦθεν εἴσεσθε. αἰσθόμενος, ὅτι τῶν ἁμαρτανομένων κληρονομήσω μὲν αὐτὸς τὴν ἀδοξίαν καὶ τὸν κίνδυνον, ἐξεργασθήσεται δὲ ἑτέροις τὰ πλεῖστα, [D] πρῶτον μὲν ἱκέτευον, εἰ ταῦτα [pg 276] πράττειν αὐτῷ φαίνοιτο καὶ πάντως ἐμὲ προσαγορεύειν καίσαρα δεδογμένον εἴη, ἄνδρας ἀγαθοὺς καὶ σπουδαίους δοῦναί μοι τοὺς ὑπουργοῦντας· ὁ δὲ πρότερον ἔδωκε τοὺς μοχθηροτάτους. ὡς δὲ ὁ μὲν εἷς ὁ πονηρότατος καὶ μάλα ἄσμενος[476] ὑπήκουσεν, οὐδεὶς δὲ ἠξίου τῶν ἄλλων, ἄνδρα δίδωσιν ἄκων ἐμοὶ καὶ μάλα ἀγαθὸν Σαλούστιον, ὃς διὰ τὴν ἀρετὴν εὐθέως αὐτῷ γέγονεν ὕποπτος. οὐκ ἀρκεσθεὶς ἐγὼ τῷ τοιούτῳ, βλέπων δὲ πρὸς τὸ διάφορον τοῦ τρόπου καὶ κατανόησας[477] τῷ μὲν ἄγαν αὐτὸν πιστεύοντα, [282] τῷ δὲ οὐδ᾽ ὅλως προσέχοντα, τῆς δεξιᾶς αὐτοῦ καὶ τῶν γονάτων ἁψάμενος· Τούτων, ἔφην, οὐδείς ἐστί μοι συνήθης οὐδὲ γέγονεν ἔμπροσθεν· ἐπιστάμενος δὲ αὐτοὺς ἐκ φήμης, σοῦ κελεύσαντος, ἑταίρους ἐμαυτοῦ καὶ φίλους νομίζω, τοῖς πάλαι γνωρίμοις ἐπ᾽ ἴσης τιμῶν. οῦ μὴν δίκαιον ἢ τούτοις ἐπιτετράφθαι τὰ ἐμὰ ἢ τὰ τούτων ἡμῖν συγκινδυνεῦσαι. τί οὖν ἱκετεύω; γραπτοὺς ἡμῖν δὸς ὥσπερ νόμους, [B] τίμων ἀπέχεσθαι χρὴ καὶ ὅσα πράττειν ἐπιτρέπεις. δῆλον γάρ, ὅτι τὸν μὲν πειθόμενον ἐπαινέσεις, τὸν δὲ ἀπειθοῦντα κολάσεις, εἰ καὶ ὅ, τι μάλιστα νομίζω μηδένα ἀπειθήσειν.
(And how I behaved to him before that you shall now learn. Since I was well aware that whenever mistakes were made I alone should incur the disgrace and danger, though most of the work was carried on by others, I first of all implored him, if he had made up his mind to that course and was altogether determined to proclaim me Caesar, to give me good and able men to assist me. He however at first gave me the vilest wretches. And when one, the most worthless of them, had very gladly accepted and no one of the others consented, he gave me with a bad grace an officer who was indeed excellent, Sallust, who on account of his virtue has at once fallen under his suspicion. And since I was not satisfied with such an arrangement and saw how his manner to them varied, for I observed that he trusted one of them too much and paid no attention at all to the other, I clasped his right hand and his knees and said: “I have no acquaintance with any of these men nor have had in the past. But I know them by report, and since you bid me I regard them as my comrades and friends and pay them as much respect as I would to old acquaintances. Nevertheless it is not just that my affairs should be entrusted to them or that their fortunes should be hazarded with mine. What then is my petition? Give me some sort of written rules as to what I must avoid and what you entrust to me to perform. For it is clear that you will approve of him who obeys you and punish him who is disobedient, though indeed I am very sure that no one will disobey you.”)
Ὅσα μὲν οὖν ἐπεχείρησεν ὁ Πεντάδιος αὐτίκα καινοτομεῖν, οὐδὲν χρὴ λέγειν· ἀντέπραττον δὲ ἐγὼ πρὸς πάντα, καὶ γίνεταί μοι δυσμενὴς ἐκεῖθεν. εἶτ᾽ ἄλλον λαβὼν καὶ παρασκευάσας δεύτερον καὶ τρίτον, Παῦλον, [C] Γαυδέντιον, τοὺς ὀνομαστοὺς ἐπ᾽ [pg 278] ἑμὲ μισθωσάμενος συκοφάντας, Σαλούστιον μὲν ὡς ἐμοὶ φίλον ἀποστῆναι παρασκευάζει, Λουκιλιανὸν δὲ δοθῆναι διάδοχον αὐτίκα. καὶ μικρὸν ὕστερον καὶ Φλωρέντιος ἦν ἐχθρὸς ἐμοὶ διὰ τὰς πλεονεξίας, αἷς ἠναντιούμην. πείθουσιν οὗτοι τὸν Κωνστάντιον ἀφελέσθαι με τῶν στρατοπέδων ἁπάντων, ἴσως τι καὶ ὑπὸ τῆς ζηλοτυπίας τῶν κατορθωμάτων κνιζόμενον, [D] καὶ γράφει γράμματα πολλῆς μὲν ἀτιμίας εἰς ἐμὲ πλήρη, Κελτοῖς δὲ ἀνάστασιν ἀπειλοῦντα· μικροῦ γὰρ δέω φάναι τὸ στρατιωτικὸν ἅπαν ἀδιακρίτως τὸ μαχιμώτατον ἀπαγαγεῖν τῆς Γαλατίας ἐκέλευσεν, ἐπιτάξας τοῦτο τὸ ἔργον Λουππικίνῳ τε καὶ Γιντωνίῳ, ἐμοὶ δὲ ὡς ἂν πρὸς μηδὲν ἐναντιωθείην αὐτοῖς ἐπέστειλεν.
(Now I need not mention the innovations that Pentadius at once tried to introduce. But I kept opposing him in everything and for that reason he became my enemy. Then Constantius chose another and a second and a third and fashioned them for his purpose, I mean Paul and Gaudentius, those notorious sycophants; he hired them to attack me and then took measures to remove Sallust, because he was my friend, and to appoint Lucilianus immediately, as his successor. And a little later Florentius also became my enemy on account of his avarice which I used to oppose. These men persuaded Constantius, who was perhaps already somewhat irritated by jealousy of my successes, to remove me altogether from command of the troops. And he wrote letters full of insults directed against me and threatening ruin to the Gauls. For he gave orders for the withdrawal from Gaul of, I might almost say, the whole of the most efficient troops without exception, and assigned this commission to Lupicinus and Gintonius, while to me he wrote that I must oppose them in nothing.)
Ἐνταῦθα μέντοι τίνα τρόπον τὰ τῶν θεῶν εἴποιμ᾽ [283] ἂν ἔργα πρὸς ὑμᾶς; διενοούμην· μάρτυρες δὲ αὐτοί· πᾶσαν ἀπορρίψας τὴν βασιλικὴν πολυτέλειαν καὶ παρασκευὴν ἡσυχάζειν, πράττειν δὲ οὐδὲν ὅλως. ἀνέμενον δὲ Φλωρέντιον παραγενέσθαι καὶ τὸν Λουππικῖνον· ἦν γὰρ ὁ μὲν περὶ τὴν Βίενναν, ὁ δὲ ἐν ταῖς Βρεττανίαις. ἐν τούτῳ θόρυβος πολὺς [B] ἦν περὶ πάντας τοὺς ἰδιώτας καὶ τοὺς στρατιώτας, καὶ γράφει τις ἀνώνυμον γραμματεῖον[478] εἰς τὴν ἀστυγείτονά μοι πόλιν πρὸς τοὺς Πετουλάντας τουτουσὶ καὶ Κελτούς· ὀνομάζεται δὲ οὕτω τὰ τάγματα· ἐν ᾧ πολλὰ μὲν ἐγέγραπτο κατ᾽ ἐκείνου, πολλοὶ δὲ ὑπὲρ τῆς Γαλλιῶν προδοσίας ὀδυρμοί· καὶ μέντοι καὶ τὴν ἐμὴν ἀτιμίαν ὁ τὸ γραμματεῖον συγγράψας ἀπωδύρετο. τοῦτο κομισθὲν ἐκίνησε πάντας, οἳ τὰ Κωνσταντίου μάλιστα ἐφρόνουν, [C] ἐπιθέσθαι μοι κατὰ τὸ καρτερώτατον, [pg 280] ὅπως ἤδη τοὺς στρατιώτας ἐκπέμψαιμι, πρὶν καὶ εἰς τοὺς ἄλλους ἀριθμοὺς ὅμοια ῥιφῆναι. καὶ γὰρ οὐδὲ ἄλλος τις παρῆν τῶν δοκούντων εὔνως ἔχειν ἐμοί, Νεβρίδιος δέ, Πεντάδιος, Δεκέντιος, ὁ παρ᾽ αὐτοῦ πεμφθεὶς ἐπ᾽ αὐτὸ τοῦτο Κωνσταντίου. λέγοντος δέ μου χρῆναι περιμένειν ἔτι Λουππικῖνον καὶ Φλωρέντιον, οὐδεὶς ἤκουσεν, ἀλλ᾽ ἔλεγον πάντες τοὐναντίον ὅτι δεῖ Ποιεῖν, εἰ μὴ βούλομαι ταῖς προλαβούσαις ὑποψίαις ὥσπερ ἀπόδειξιν [D] καὶ τεκμήριον τοῦτο προσθεῖναι. εἶτα προσέθεσαν ὡς Νῦν μὲν ἐκπεμφθέντων αὐτὼν σόν ἐστι τὸ ἔργον, ἀφικομένων δὲ τούτων οὐ σοὶ τοῦτο, ἀλλ᾽ ἐκείνοις λογιεῖται Κωνστάντιος, σὺ δὲ ἐν αἰτίᾳ γενήσῃ. γράψαι δή[479] με ἔπεισαν αὐτῷ, μᾶλλον δὲ ἐβιάσαντο· πείθεται μὲν γὰρ ἐκεῖνος, ᾧπερ ἔξεστι καὶ μὴ πεισθῆναι, βιάζεσθαι δὲ οἷς ἂν ἐξῇ, τοῦ πείθειν οὐδὲν προσδέονται· οὔκουν οὐδὲ οἱ βιασθέντες τῶν πεπεισμένων εἰσίν, ἀλλὰ τῶν ἀναγκασθέντων. ἐσκοποῦμεν ἐνταῦθα, [284] ποίαν ὁδὸν αὐτοὺς χρὴ βαδίζειν, διττῆς οὔσης. ἐγὼ μὲν ἠξίουν ἑτέραν τραπῆναι, οἱ δὲ αὖθις ἀναγκάζουσιν ἐκείνην ἰέναι, μὴ τοῦτο αὐτὸ γενόμενον ὥσπερ ἀφορμήν τινα στάσεως τοῖς στρατιώταις παράσχῃ καὶ ταραχῆς τινος αἴτιον γένηται, εἶτα στασιάζειν ἅπαξ ἀρξάμενοι πάντα ἀθρόως ταράξωσιν. ἐδόκει τὸ δέος οὐ παντάπασιν ἄλογον εἶναι τῶν ἀνθρώπων.
(And now in what terms shall I describe to you the work of the gods? It was my intention, as they will bear me witness, to divest myself of all imperial splendour and state and remain in peace, taking no part whatever in affairs. But I waited for Florentius and Lupicinus to arrive; for the former was at Vienne, the latter in Britain. Meanwhile there was great excitement among the civilians and the troops, and someone wrote an anonymous letter to the town near where I was,[480] addressed to the Petulantes and the Celts—those were the names of the legions—full of invectives against Constantius and of lamentations about his betrayal of the Gauls. Moreover the author of the letter lamented bitterly the disgrace inflicted on myself. This letter when it arrived provoked all those who were most definitely on the side of Constantius to urge me in the strongest terms to send away the troops at once, before similar letters could be scattered broadcast among the rest of the legions. And indeed there was no one there belonging to the party supposed to be friendly to me, but only Nebridius, Pentadius, and Decentius, the latter of whom had been despatched for this very purpose by Constantius. And when I replied that we ought to wait still longer for Lupicinus and Florentius, no one listened to me, but they all declared that we ought to do the very opposite, unless I wished to add this further proof and evidence for the suspicions that were already entertained about me. And they added this argument: “If you send away the troops now it will be regarded as your measure, but when the others come Constantius will give them not you the credit and you will be held to blame.” And so they persuaded or rather compelled me to write to him. For he alone may be said to be persuaded who has the power to refuse, but those who can use force have no need to persuade as well;[481] then again where force is used there is no persuasion, but a man is the victim of necessity. Thereupon we discussed by which road, since there were two, the troops had better march. I preferred that they should take one of these, but they immediately compelled them to take the other, for fear that the other route if chosen should give rise to mutiny among the troops and cause some disturbance, and that then, when they had once begun to mutiny, they might throw all into confusion. Indeed such apprehension on their part seemed not altogether without grounds.)
Ἦλθε τὰ τάγματα, ὑπήντησα κατὰ τὸ νενομισμένον αὐτοῖς, [B] ἔχεσθαι τῆς ὁδοῦ προύτρεψα· μίαν [pg 282] ἡμέραν ἐπέμεινεν, ἄχρις ἧς οὐδὲν ᾔδειν ἐγὼ τῶν βεβουλευμένων αὐτοῖς· ἴστω Ζεύς, Ἥλιος, Ἄρης, Ἀθηνᾶ καὶ πάντες θεοί, ὡς οὐδὲ ἐγγὺς ἀφίκετό μού τις τοιαύτη ὑπόνοια ἄχρι δείλης αὐτῆς· ὀψίας δὲ ἤδη περὶ ἡλίου δυσμὰς ἐμηνύθη μοι, καὶ αὐτίκα τὰ βασίλεια περιείληπτο, καὶ ἐβόων πάντες, ἔτι φροντίζοντός μου τί χρὴ ποιεῖν καὶ οὔπω σφόδρα πιστεύοντος· [C] ὔτυχον γὰρ ἔτι τῆς γαμετῆς ζώσης μοι ἀναπαυσόμενος ἰδίᾳ πρὸς τὸ πλησίον ὑπερῷον ἀνελθών. εἶτα ἐκεῖθεν· ἀνεπέπτατο γὰρ ὁ τοῖχος· προσεκύνησα τὸν Δία. γενομένης δὲ ἔτι μείζονος τῆς βοῆς καὶ θορυβουμένων πάντων ἐν τοῖς βασιλείοις, ᾐτέομεν τὸν θεὸν δοῦναι τέρας. αὐτὰρ ὅ γ᾽ ἡμῖν δεῖξε καὶ ἠνώγει πεισθῆναι καὶ μὴ προσεναντιοῦσθαι τοῦ στρατοπέδου τῇ προθυμίᾳ. γενομένων ὅμως [D] ἐμοὶ καὶ τούτων τῶν σημείων, οὐκ εἶξα ἑτοίμως, ἀλλ᾽ ἀντέσχον εἰς ὅσον ἠδυνάμην, καὶ οὔτε τὴν πρόσρησιν οὔτε τὸν στέφανον προσιέμην. ἐπεὶ δὲ οὔτε εἷς ὢν[482] πολλῶν ἠδυνάμην κρατεῖν οἵ τε τοῦτο βουλόμενοι γενέσθαι θεοὶ τοὺς μὲν παρώξυνον, ἐμοὶ δὲ ἔθελγον τὴν γνώμην, ὥρᾳ που τρίτῃ σχεδὸν οὐκ οἶδα οὗτινός μοι στρατιώτου δόντος μανιάκην περιεθέμην καὶ ἦλθον εἰς τὰ βασίλεια, ἔνδοθεν ἀπ᾽ αὐτῆς, ὡς ἴσασιν οἱ θεοί, στένων τῆς καρδίας. [285] καίτοι χρῆν δήπουθεν πιστεύοντα τῷ φήναντι θεῷ τὸ τέρας θαρρεῖν· ἀλλ᾽ [pg 284] ᾐσχυνόμην δεινῶς καὶ κατεδυόμην, εἰ δόξαιμι μὴ πιστῶς ἄχρι τέλους ὑπακοῦσαι Κωνσταντίῳ.
(The legions arrived, and I, as was customary, went to meet them and exhorted them to continue their march. For one day they halted, and till that time I knew nothing whatever of what they had determined; I call to witness Zeus, Helios, Ares, Athene, and all the other gods that no such suspicion even entered my mind until that very evening. It was already late, when about sunset the news was brought to me, and suddenly the palace was surrounded and they all began to shout aloud, while I was still considering what I ought to do and feeling by no means confident. My wife was still alive and it happened, that in order to rest alone, I had gone to the upper room near hers. Then from there through an opening in the wall I prayed to Zeus. And when the shouting grew still louder and all was in a tumult in the palace I entreated the god to give me a sign; and thereupon he showed me a sign[483] and bade me yield and not oppose myself to the will of the army. Nevertheless even after these tokens had been vouchsafed to me I did not yield without reluctance, but resisted as long as I could, and would not accept either the salutation[484] or the diadem. But since I could not singlehanded control so many, and moreover the gods, who willed that this should happen, spurred on the soldiers and gradually softened my resolution, somewhere about the third hour some soldier or other gave me the collar and I put it on my head and returned to the palace, as the gods know groaning in my heart. And yet surely it was my duty to feel confidence and to trust in the god after he had shown me the sign; but I was terribly ashamed and ready to sink into the earth at the thought of not seeming to obey Constantius faithfully to the last.)
Πολλῆς οὖν οὔσης περὶ τὰ βασίλεια κατηφείας, τοῦτον εὐθὺς οἱ Κωνσταντίου φίλοι τὸν καιρὸν ἁρπάσαι διανοηθέντες ἐπιβουλήν μοι ῥάπτουσιν αὐτίκα καί διένειμαν τοῖς στρατιώταις χρήματα, δυοῖν θάτερον προσδοκῶντες, ἢ διαστήσειν ἀλλήλους ἢ [B] καὶ παντάπασιν ἐπιθήσεσθαι[485] μοι φανερῶς. αἰσθόμενός τις τῶν ἐπιτεταγμένων τῇ προόδῳ τῆς ἐμῆς γαμετῆς λάθρᾳ πραττόμενον αὐτὸ ἐμοὶ μὲν πρῶτον ἐμήνυσεν, ὡς δὲ ἑώρα με μηδὲν προσέχοντα, παραφρονήσας ὥσπερ οἱ θεόληπτοι δημοσίᾳ βοᾶν ἤρξατο κατὰ τὴν ἀγοράν· Ἄνδρες στρατιῶται καὶ ξένοι καὶ πολῖται, μὴ προδῶτε τὸν αὐτοκράτορα. εἶτα ἐμπίπτει θυμὸς εἰς τοὺς στρατιώτας, καὶ πάντες εἰς τὰ βασίλεια μετὰ τῶν ὅπλων ἔθεον. [C] καταλαβόντες δέ με ζῶντα καὶ χαρέντες ὥσπερ οἱ τοὺς ἐξ ἀνελπίστων ὀφθέντας φίλους ἄλλος ἄλλοθεν περιέβαλλον καὶ περιέπλεκον καὶ ἐπὶ τῶν ὤμων ἔφερον, καὶ ἦν πως τὸ πρᾶγμα θέας ἄξιον, ἐνθουσιασμῷ γὰρ ἐῴκει. ὡς δέ με ἁπανταχόθεν περιέσχον, ἐξῄτουν ἅπαντας τοὺς Κωνσταντίου φίλους ἐπὶ τιμωρίᾳ. πηλίκον ἠγωνισάμην ἀγῶνα σῶσαι [D] βουλόμενος αὐτούς, ἴσασιν οἱ θεοὶ πάντες.
(Now since there was the greatest consternation in the palace, the friends of Constantius thought they would seize the occasion to contrive a plot against me without delay, and they distributed money to the soldiers, expecting one of two things, either that they would cause dissension between me and the troops, or no doubt that the latter would attack me openly. But when a certain officer belonging to those who commanded my wife's escort perceived that this was being secretly contrived, he first reported it to me and then, when he saw that I paid no attention to him, he became frantic, and like one possessed he began to cry aloud before the people in the market-place, “Fellow soldiers, strangers, and citizens, do not abandon the Emperor!” Then the soldiers were inspired by a frenzy of rage and they all rushed to the palace under arms. And when they found me alive, in their delight, like men who meet friends whom they had not hoped to see again, they pressed round me on this side and on that, and embraced me and carried me on their shoulders. And it was a sight worth seeing, for they were like men seized with a divine frenzy. Then after they had surrounded me on all sides they demanded that I give up to them for punishment the friends of Constantius. What fierce opposition I had to fight down in my desire to save those persons is known to all the gods.)