He'd 80 Knackers, 20 Breads
And just (£) 400 Saras,
(£) 1,000 Middies, 20 Tanks,
And (£) 57 Claras.
200 Chinas (£) 90 Megs,
10 Virgins (£) 40 Doras,
(£) 1,000 Vestas, Matches 10,
12 Bones and (£) 80 Noras,
The Cash at Bank was £80,
The Cash in House was seven,
The Furniture was valued at
Four hundred pounds eleven.
Debts due at death were £90,
And no one in their senses
Can say that £20 was much
For Funeral Expenses.
The Trustee read the Will with care
And studied it minutely,
And found that all was left unto
The Widow absolutely,
Except some Legacies, which made
The worthy man feel dizzy,
He read "I hereby leave my Bags
Unto my daughter Lizzie."
"I leave the Virgins to my son,
Advising him to hold them,
Unless it proves upon my death
I've previously sold them."
"I solemnly bequeath my Bones
Unto my second sonny,
Although I know they'll quickly be
Converted into money."
"I also feel in duty bound
To leave my brother's kiddies
A Legacy, so let his girls
Take over all the Middies."
"My Trustee gets a hundred pounds
For trouble and attention,
All Legacies are duty free,
Perhaps I ought to mention."