“Look here, Jim Hockey,” said Abe, rising up from a back seat, and pointing his pipe-stem at the chairman; “I don’t keer if you give that thing there a whole string o’ silver buttons—and Lord knows he wants ’em, to keep himself from falling to pieces—but I tell you, you’re opsettin’ the laws of nature goin’ about killing the animiles off the face of the yearth. It’s not the mean, sneaking way you’ve got inter of dropping pizen pills all over the place that riles me so much as the killin’ of ’em off by the thousan’ without takin’ any thought of what’s coming. Take baboons—”
“Are we here, Mr Chairman, to listen to a speech from Mr Pike, or are we not?” asked one member, who was credited with having opened a market in jackals’ tails.
“Take baboons,” said Abe, pointing his pipe-stem insultingly at his interrupter. “I allow they’re mean, I allow they eat your mealies, steal your fruit, kill a sheep or two, and frighten your wives; but if it warn’t for the baboons there’d be a scorpion under every stone and a centipede in every ole stump. The baboons eat them vermin. Take cats—if it warn’t for cats the lands would be swarmin’ with mice. If it warn’t for the jackals there’d be a hare in every grass clump.”
“If it warn’t for Abe Pike,” said Silas, with a look of disgust, “there’d be a durn sight less jaw.”
“Hear, hear!”
“Year away,” said Abe, “and listen to this. When you’re done killin’ all these critturs, the scorpions, an’ the centipedes, an’ the rats, an’ the snakes, an’ the spiders’ll swarm all over you. What yer got ter do is to set Nature ag’in Nature. The wild buck can look after hisself; teach the tame goat and the sheep to do the same.”
“The laws of Nature, Abe, have covered your lands with weeds.”
“Yes; and reduced his mangy live stock to one goat,” added Si.
“Laugh! yer yeller-eyed, big-footed, long-legged, two-headed, freckled-faced duffers—laugh!—but I bet you that ole goat’ll knock the stuffin’ out of your club, and purtect hisself ag’in any wild crittur, from a stink-cat to a tiger.”
“You’re jawing,” said Si; “otherwise I’d hold you to your bounce.”