Doris. You must be crazy.
Dada. [He can scarcely keep awake.] Hm.
Doris. Look at here! What do you mean—have you been spending that money—that doesn’t belong to you, you know—on some fast woman?
Dada [as usual, he doesn’t quite hear]. Yes, it’s all gone. I went down yesterday morning and I said to myself: “Horatio, you got only seven thousand dollars left, and you got to work from morning till night and get rid of it.” And I did.
Doris [furious, but impressed at the magnitude of the crime]. How much was there altogether?
Dada. Altogether? I haven’t the figures with me.
Doris. Why, you old dumb-bell, you. Imagine an old man your age that hasn’t had anything to do for twenty years but just sit around and think, going crazy about a woman at your age! [With scornful pity.] Don’t you know she just made a fool of you?
Dada [shaking his finger at her]. You must not talk like that. Be courteous and——
Doris. Yes, and pretty soon some woman comes along and you get “courteous” with her to the extent of all the money in the Treasury.
Dada. Yes, that’s one thing that stood me in good stead. My mother used to say to me: “Horatio——”