“‘Ah! madam,’ cried Mr. B——y, ‘this Latin—things of that kind—we waste our youth, ma’am, in these vain studies. For my part, I wish I had spent mine in studying French and Spanish—more useful, ma’am. But, bless me, ma’am, what time have I had for that kind of thing? Travelling here, over the ocean, hills and dales, ma’am—reading the great book of the world—poor ignorant mortals, ma’am—no time to do anything.’
“‘Ay, Mr. B——y,’ said Mrs. Thrale, ‘I remember how you downed Beauclerk and Hamilton, the wits, once at our house, when they talked of ghosts!’
“‘Ah! ma’am, give me a brace of pistols, and I warrant I’ll manage a ghost for you! Not but Providence may please to send little spirits—guardian angels, ma’am—to watch us: that I can’t speak about. It would be presumptuous, ma’am—for what can a poor, ignorant mortal know?’
“‘Ay, so you told Beauclerk and Hamilton.’
“‘Oh yes, ma’am. Poor human beings can’t account for anything—and call themselves esprits forts. I vow ’tis presumptuous, ma’am! Esprits forts, indeed! they can see no farther than their noses, poor, ignorant mortals! Here’s an admiral, and here’s a prince, and here’s a general, and here’s a dipper—and poor Smoker, the bather, ma’am! What’s all this strutting about, and that kind of thing? and then they can’t account for a blade of grass!’
“After this, Dr. Johnson being mentioned,
“‘Ay,’ said he, ‘I’m sorry he did not come down with you. I liked him better than those others: not much of a fine gentleman, indeed, but a clever fellow—a deal of knowledge—got a deuced good understanding!’...
“I am absolutely almost ill with laughing. This Mr. B——y half convulses me; yet I cannot make you laugh by writing his speeches, because it is the manner which accompanies them that, more than the matter, renders them so peculiarly ridiculous. His extreme pomposity, the solemn stiffness of his person, the conceited twinkling of his little old eyes, and the quaint importance of his delivery, are so much more like some pragmatical old coxcomb represented on the stage, than like anything in real and common life, that I think, were I a man, I should sometimes be betrayed into clapping him for acting so well. As it is, I am sure no character in any comedy I ever saw has made me laugh more extravagantly.
“He dines and spends the evening here constantly, to my great satisfaction.
“At dinner, when Mrs. Thrale offers him a seat next her, he regularly says: