Overwhelmed with domestic affliction, neither Mrs. Sturt nor I were in a fit state to decide for ourselves whether we would accept the Sirdar's protection or not. There was but faint hope of our ever getting safe to Jellalabad; and we followed the stream. But although there was much talk regarding our going over, all I personally know of the affair is, that I was told we were all to go, and that our horses were ready, and we must mount immediately and be off.
We were taken by a very circuitous route to the Khoord Cabul forts, where we found Mahommed Akbar Khan, and the hostages. Mr. Boyd's little boy had been brought there, and was restored to his parents. Mrs. Burnes and young Stoker were also saved, and joined our party. Anderson's little girl is said to have been taken to Cabul, to the Nawaub Zeman Shah Khan.
Three rooms were cleared out for us, having no outlets except a small door to each; and of course they were dark and dirty. The party to which I belonged consisted of Mrs. Trevor and seven children, Lieut. and Mrs. Waller and child, Mrs. Sturt, Mr. Mein, and myself, Mrs. Smith and Mrs. Burnes, two soldiers' wives, and young Stoker, child of a soldier of the 13th, who was saved from people who were carrying him off to the hills, and came in covered, we fear, with his mother's blood: of her we have no account, nor of Mrs. Cunningham, both of the 13th. The dimensions of our room are at the utmost fourteen feet by ten.
At midnight some mutton bones and greasy rice were brought to us.
All that Mrs. Sturt and I possess are the clothes on our backs in which we quitted Cabul.
Here I must divide the account. I shall go on with my own personal adventures; and afterwards, from the same date, follow up the fortunes of our unhappy army, from the journals of friends who, thank God! have lived through all their sufferings.
10th.—Mahommed Akbar Khan left us, to escort our troops. 500 deserters are said to have come in to him. It is reported that the thieves have nearly exterminated our force; and that four of Mahommed Akbar's sirdars are killed. Akbar is expected back at night; and if the road is clear, we are to march at night and go thirty miles. Some officers are said to have taken refuge in a fort near this place. A letter came from the General, stating that he wished Capt. Anderson and Capt. Boyd to return: this was in consequence of a representation made to him that Anderson's making over the command of his corps to Lieut. Le Geyt, and going away, might have a bad effect on his men, who now showed symptoms of an inclination to leave us to our fate. But it was decided by the politicals that for those officers to return would have the appearance of their faith in the Sirdar's promises being shaken, and that it would be productive of much evil: they remained therefore with us. Here was another instance of the General's vacillation. Anderson, on his return from taking the message to bring the troops back, was ordered by the General to go off with the other married men and families. Whatever may have been his own sentiments on the occasion, his opinion was never asked, and he had but to obey.
11th.—We marched; being necessitated to leave all the servants that could not walk, the Sirdar promising that they should be fed. It would be impossible for me to describe the feelings with which we pursued our way through the dreadful scenes that awaited us. The road covered with awfully mangled bodies, all naked: fifty-eight Europeans were counted in the Tunghee and dip of the Nullah; the natives innumerable. Numbers of camp followers, still alive, frostbitten and starving; some perfectly out of their senses and idiotic. Major Ewart, 54th, and Major Scott, 44th, were recognised as we passed them; with some others. The sight was dreadful; the smell of the blood sickening; and the corpses lay so thick it was impossible to look from them, as it required care to guide my horse so as not to tread upon the bodies: but it is unnecessary to dwell on such a distressing and revolting subject.
We hear that Mahommed Abkar Khan offered to escort the army down, provided the troops laid down their arms; but that the General went on, upon his own responsibility.
We arrived at the Tézeen fort, where we were well treated; and where we found Lieut. Melville, 54th. He had, in guarding the colour of his regiment, received five severe wounds. He had fortunately seven rupees about him; these he gave to an Affghan to take him to the Sirdar, who dressed his wounds with his own hands, applying burnt rags; and paid him every attention.