We have pleasures here even in winter peculiar to the climate, which counterbalance the evils we suffer from its rigor.
Good night, my dear Lucy!
LETTER CXIII.115.
To Mrs. Temple, Pall Mall.
Quebec, April 2.
I have this moment, my dear, a letter from Montreal, describing some lands on Lake Champlain, which my friend thinks much better worth my taking than those near the Kamaraskas: he presses me to come up immediately to see them, as the ice on the rivers will in a few days be dangerous to travel on.
I am strongly inclined to go, and for this reason; I am convinced my wish of bringing about a friendship between Emily and Madame Des Roches, the strongest reason I had for fixing at the Kamaraskas, was an imprudent one: gratitude and (if the expression is not impertinent) compassion give me a softness in my behaviour to the latter, which a superficial observer would take for love, and which her own tenderness may cause even her to misconstrue; a circumstance which must retard her resolution of changing the affection with which she has honored me, into friendship.
I am also delicate in my love, and cannot bear to have it one moment supposed, my heart can know a wish but for my Emily.
Shall I say more? The blush on Emily’s cheek on her first seeing Madame Des Roches convinced me of my indiscretion, and that vanity alone carried me to desire to bring together two women, whose affection for me is from their extreme merit so very flattering.
I shall certainly now fix in Canada; I can no longer doubt of Emily’s tenderness, though she refuses me her hand, from motives which make her a thousand times more dear to me, but which I flatter myself love will over-rule.