Actus Primus. Scæna Prima.
Enter Gentleman [a[n]d] Jaques.
Gent. What happiness waits on the life at Court,
What dear content, greatness, delight and ease!
What ever-springing hopes, what tides of honor!
That raise their fortunes to the height of wishes!
What can be more in man, what more in nature,
Than to be great and fear'd? A Courtier,
A noble Courtier, 'Tis a name that draws
Wonder and duty from all eyes and knees.
Jaq. And so your Worships Land within the Walls,
Where you shall have it all inclos'd, and sure.
Gent. Peace knave; dull creature, bred of sweat and smoke,
These mysteries are far above thy faith:
But thou shalt see—
Jaq. And then I shall believe;
Your fair revenues, turn'd into fair suits;
I shall believe your Tenant's bruis'd and rent
Under the weight of Coaches, all your state
Drawn through the streets in triumph, suits for places
Plied with a Mine of Gold, and being got
Fed with a great stream. I shall believe all this.
Gent. You shall believe, and know me glorious.
Cosin, good day and health.
Enter Cosin.
Cosin. The same to you, Sir,
And more, without my wishes, could you know
What calm content dwels in a private house:
Yet look into your self, retire: this place
Of promises, and protestations, fits
Minds only bent [t]o] ruin, you should know this,
You have their language perfect, you have tutors
I do not doubt, sufficient: but beware.
Gent. You are merry Cosin:
Cosin. Yet your patience,
You shall learn that too, but not like it self,
Where it is held a virtue; tell me Sir,
Have you cast up your State, rated your Land,
And find it able to endure the change
Of time and fashion? is it always harvest?
Always vintage? have you Ships at Sea,
To bring you Gold and Stone from rich Peru,
Monthly returning Treasure? doth the King
Open his large Exchequer to your hands
And bid [ye be] a great man? can your wife
Coin off her beauty? or the week allow
Suits to each day? and know no ebb in honor?
If these be possible, and can hold out,
Then be a Courtier still, and still be wasting.
Gent. Cosin, pray give me leave:
Cos. I have done.
Gent. I could requite your gall, and in a strain
As bitter, and as full of Rubarb, [preach]
Against your Countrey life, but 'tis below me
And only subject to my pitty, know
The eminent Court, to them that can be wise,
And fasten on her blessings, is a Sun
That draws men up from course and earthly Being,
I mean these men of merit that have power
And reason to make good her benefits,
Learns them a manly boldness, gives their tongues
Sweetness of Language, makes them apt to please;
Files of all rudeness, and uncivil haviour,
Shews them as neat in carriage, as in cloaths;
Cosin, have you ever seen the Court?
Cos. No Sir,
Nor am I yet in [travel] with that longing.
Gent. Oh the state and greatness of that place
Where men are found
Only to give the first creation glory!
Those are the models of the antient world
Left like the Roman Statues to stir up
Our following hopes, the place it self puts on
The brow of Majesty, and flings her lustre
Like the air newly light'ned; Form, and Order,
Are only there themselves, unforc'd, and sound,
As they were first created to this place.
Cos. You nobly came, but will goe from thence base.
Gent. 'Twas very pretty, and a good conceit;
You have a wit good Cosin, I do joy in't,
Keep it for Court: but to my self again,
When I have view'd these pieces, turn'd these eyes,
And with some taste of superstition,
Look'd on the wealth of Nature, the fair dames,
Beauties, that [light the Court, and make] it shew
Like a fair heaven, in a frosty night:
And 'mongst these mine, not poorest, 'tis for tongues
Of blessed Poets, such as Orpheus was,
To give their worth and praises; Oh dear Cosin:
You have a wife, and fair, bring her hither,
Let her not live to be the Mistriss of a Farmers heir
And be confin'd ever to a searge,
Far courser than my horse-cloth.
Let her have Velvets, Tiffinies, Jewels, Pearls,
A Coach, an Usher, and her two Lacquies,
And I will send my wife to give her rules,
And read the rudiments of Court to her.
Cos. Sir, I had rather send her to Virginia
To help to propagate the English Nation.
Enter Servant.
Gent. Sirrah, how slept your Mistriss, and what visitants
Are to pay service?
Serv. As I came out,
Two Counts were newly ent'red.
Gent. This is greatness,
But few such servants wait a Countrey beauty.
Cos. They are the more to thank their modesty,
God keep my Wife, and all my Issue Female
From such uprisings.
Enter a Doctor.
Gent. What? my learned Doctor?
You will be welcome, give her health and youth
And I will give you gold. [Exit Doctor.
Cosin, how savors this? is it not sweet
And very great, tasts it not of Nobleness?
Cos. Faith Sir, my pallat is too dull and lazie
I cannot taste it, 'tis not for my relish,
But be so still.
Since your own misery must first reclaim ye,
To which I leave you, Sir,
If you will, yet be happy, leave the humor
And base subjection to your Wife, be wise,
And let her know with speed, you are her Husband,
I shall be glad to hear it.
My horse is sent for. [Exit.
Gent. Even such another countrey thing as this
Was I, such a piece of dirt, so heavy,
So provident to heap up ignorance,
And be an ass: such musty cloaths wore I,
So old and thred-bare, I do yet remember
Divers young Gallants lighting at my Gate,
To see my honoured Wife, have offered pence,
And bid me walk their horses, such a slave
Was I in shew then: but my eyes are open'd.