“Never mind, man,” returned Lawless, “there are worse misfortunes happen at sea; a little sticking-plaster will set all to rights again. But look here, Fairlegh,” he continued, taking my arm, “I'm glad I happened to meet you; I want to have five minutes' serious conversation with you.”
“Won't it do after breakfast?” interposed I, for my fears construed this appeal into “confirmation strong as holy writ” of my previous suspicions, and I wished to be fortified by my mother's opinion before I in any degree committed myself. All my precautions were, however, in vain.
“Eh! I won't keep you five minutes, but you see this sort of thing will never do at any price; I'm all wrong altogether—sometimes I feel as if fire and water would not stop me, or cart-ropes hold me—then again I grow as nervous as an old cat with the palsy, and sit moping in a corner like an owl in fits. Last hunting-day I was just as if I was mad—pressed upon the pack when they were getting away—rode over two or three of the tail hounds, laid 'em sprawling on their backs, like spread eagles, till the huntsman swore at me loud enough to split a three-inch oak plank—went slap at everything that came in my way—took rails, fences, and timber, all flying, rough and smooth as nature made 'em—in short, showed the whole field the way across country at a pace which rather astonished them, I fancy;—well, at last there was a check, and before the hounds got on the scent again, something seemed to come over me, so that I could not ride a bit, and kept cranning at mole-hills and shirking gutters, till I wound up by getting a tremendous purl from checking my horse at a wretched little fence that he could have stepped over, and actually I felt so fainthearted that I gave it up as a bad job, and rode home ready to eat my hat with vexation. But I know what it is, I'm in love—that confounded Charade put me up to that dodge. I fancied at first that I had got an ague, one of those off-and-on affairs that always come just when you don't want them, and was going to ask Ellis to give me a ball, but I found it out just in time, and precious glad I was too, for I never could bear taking physic since I was the height of sixpenny worth of halfpence.”
“Really, Lawless, I must be getting home.”
“Eh! wait a minute; you haven't an idea what a desperate state I'm in; I had a letter returned to me yesterday, with a line from the post-office clerk, saying no such person could be found, and when I came to look at the address I wasn't surprised to hear it. I had written to give some orders about a dog-cart that is building for me, and directed my letter to 'Messrs. Lovely Fanny, Coachmakers, Long Acre'. Things can't go on in this way, you know—I must do something—come to the point, eh?—What do you say?”
“Upon my word,” replied I, “this is a case in which I am the last person to advise you.”
“Eh I no, it is not that—I'm far beyond the reach of advice, but what I mean is, your governor being dead—don't you see—I consider you to stand in propria quae maribus, as we used to say at old Mildman's.”
“In loco parentis is what you are aiming at, I imagine,” returned I.
“Eh! Psha, it's all the same!” continued Lawless impatiently; “but what do you say about it? Will you give your consent, and back me up a bit in the business?—for I'm precious nervous, I can tell you.”
“Am I to understand, then,” said I, seeing an explanation was inevitable, “that it is my sister who has inspired you with this very alarming attachment?”