Peter: Softly, my good friends; if you enhance the price of butter and salt meat to such an extent, you cut down beforehand the profit I expect from my wood.
Paul: And my speculation will be no longer so wondrously profitable, if I am overcharged for my firewood and bacon.
John: And I, what shall I gain by overcharging you for my sausages, if you overcharge me for my faggots and bread and butter?
Peter: Very well, don't let us quarrel Let us rather put our heads together and make reciprocal concessions. Moreover, it is not good to consult one's self-interest exclusively—we must exercise humanity, and see that the people do not want fuel.
Paul: Very right; and it is proper that the people should have butter to their bread.
John: Undoubtedly; and a bit of bacon for the pot.
All: Three cheers for charity; three cheers for philanthropy; and to-morrow we take the octroi by assault.
Peter: Ah! I forgot. One word more; it is essential. My good friends, in this age of egotism the world is distrustful, and the purest intentions are often misunderstood. Paul, you take the part of pleading for the wood; John will do the same for the butter; and I shall devote myself to the home-bred pig. It is necessary to prevent malignant suspicions.
Paul and John (leaving): Upon my word, that is a clever fellow.
Scene II.—Council Chamber.