NOW it was at this evil time, when the meagre, weak and bloodless misery of the dogs had reached its depth, and the burden upon them of the unasked-for means for their salvation was heaviest; and the fleas had reached the limit of their biggest and tightest expansibility, that a vague terror took possession of the fleas. This was occasioned by the strange behavior of the dogs at various times.
Sometimes a dog, right in the midst of his very insanest scratching for food, would flop suddenly down in the gutter and look up to heaven, and sigh and scratch his head as though he had a dark problem on his mind, the solution of which might be found up there. After a spell of this sort of contemplation the dog would as suddenly resume his insanity, apparently having concluded that his looking up there was in vain.
Then it was noticed that several insane dogs, when they met, would stop and all together look up to heaven, and sigh and then look into each other’s eyes, as though seeking therein for light on some dark conundrum; when, after a few moments of such contemplation, they would all simultaneously let off a bark of disappointment, resume their insanity and scatter.
On brilliant moonlight nights, some of the dogs that had looked up to heaven in the daytime and seen nothing, would stare up at the moon for a long time and wag their tails and heads with apparent satisfaction, and bark vociferously; but no one gave heed to them, as they were said to be lunatics.
Others meandered down to the edge of the pond, and after gazing in a distraught and far-away manner for a time, would shake their heads, and, suddenly turning tail, would scamper off and fall to their scratching more madly than ever.
Sometimes hundreds of them would gather in the open places and look, some towards the East, some towards the West, some towards the North, and some towards the South, and some towards the zenith, and each set would bark.
And it was told the eminent fleas, and the large fleas, and the Monstrous Fleas, how many of the dogs were behaving. And the fleas were much concerned, and called all the wise fleas that could be found, and diligently inquired of them what time this erratic behavior had broken out, and what it might mean?
And the wise fleas answered they didn’t know unless it was that some queer and unusual disease had broken out amongst them, and they were having spells of sanity, and might during those spells, be thinking and pondering and meditating, in which case it behooved the fleas to watch them closely and take steps to apply some remedy.
Some of the fleas said that was sound advice and ought to be taken at once, as thinking was the very worst disease a dog could have. Experience had shown that this disease was a most insidious one, whose first symptoms were very insignificant and unimportant, but in time developed into a most contagious, infectious and deadly plague, and they would advise that a Board of Health be organized at once, and a number of inspectors be appointed to make domiciliary visits amongst the dogs to ascertain and report on their mental condition. Thus, a possible epidemic of thinking might be checked in its incipiency, and a possibly great calamity avoided.
But most of the fleas said they didn’t think there was any cause for alarm—at least just now; for if the dogs had really caught the thinking infection, it was so slightly that it would amount to nothing; but if the case should really grow serious, they had great confidence that the police dogs were so good and faithful (being well fed), that any very serious case would be promptly quarantined; and if extreme measures should be called for, the dog so afflicted could be killed; which was, in the opinion of all eminent fleas, an infallible cure in the case of that dog, and an infallible preventive of the disease in any other.