When once engaged by mutual vows, the young people have nothing more to do than to acquaint their parents with the object of their choice. It is seldom that the latter throw any impediment in the way of the happiness of their children. The circumstances which too frequently oppose the union of families in our polished societies cannot exist among people who are content with the possession of a few head of cattle and a few acres of land, for which, moreover, they have to dispute with the snow on the mountains.
The lover, hurried away by his passion and his natural impetuosity, warmly extols the qualities of his mistress, and spares no pains to obtain from his parents an approval of the sentiments by which he is animated. The old folks, naturally more cool, seldom decide at once: but to satisfy themselves of the sincerity of their son’s attachment, they put it to the test in various ways. These trials differ with the age and character both of the son and of the father. Some send their sons into Switzerland, Bavaria, or Italy, with various productions of the country which they are to dispose of there, and to interest them in the success of the enterprise they give up to them all the profit. “Go,” say their parents, “earn thy wife. To be a good father, a man must be able to get bread for his children.”
Not less dutiful as a son than ardent as a lover, the young Tyrolese never opposes the commands of his parents. How painful soever it be to him to leave his mistress and his beloved mountains, he departs, but not till he has presented the idol of his heart with a pledge of his fidelity in the ribbons that adorned his hat. He, moreover, places in her bosom the flower which renews the memory of love, and which for that reason is named forget-me-not. The damsel gives him in return the girdle which encircles her waist, and in which she has secretly embroidered the initials of the name of the favoured youth. The most amorous swains do not quit the hamlet till they have played upon the rustic bagpipe some plaintive ditty, to which their mistress listens surrounded by her female companions, who are ever ready to share her sorrows.
Other fathers subject their sons to trials of shorter duration, sending them for a few months to the herdsmen’s huts on the high mountains. Here the youths tend the herds and flocks, and strive as much as possible to increase the produce from them by their management. They also gather bilberries and the leaves of the spike (valeriana celtica) which has such a delightful smell. These occupations render them robust, and habituate them to fatigue. The spike grows only on the tops of the second-rate mountains and on the steep sides of those which are crowned with snow. This aromatic plant is exported to the East, where its perfume is destined to delight the voluptuous inmates of the seraglio. The roots of the gentians also are collected on the mountains, and from these they extract the juice, which yields a spirit that is highly esteemed.
The wealthier Tyrolese have recourse to other means to assure themselves of the sincerity of the attachment of their sons. They take them out into companies where they are likely to meet young females worthy of their notice; but if the sight of fresh objects produces no change in their sentiments, the parents no longer withhold their consent.
The day on which the damsel’s hand is formally solicited, is a festival not only for the two families but for the whole hamlet. The Tyrolese in general regard each other as brothers. The father of the young man arrays himself in his best apparel. Laying aside the jacket suitable for working days only, he puts on a coat decorated with ribbons of various colours. By his dress and the pleasure that sparkles in his eyes, it is evident that he is going on a joyful errand. He takes with him his younger sons, who carry baskets in which his first presents are deposited. In one he places honeycombs, the fragrance of which is heightened by the sweet-smelling thyme and other aromatic Alpine plants, with which they are surrounded; and puts into another the finest fruits of the season, not forgetting some cakes made by a beloved daughter.
On reaching the damsel’s abode, the father is introduced by the uncle or the nearest relative. Here he finds the family of his future daughter-in-law assembled. All present rise and salute him. “Welcome, my friend!” says the head of the family to him. “What motive brings thee among us?”—“As thou art a father,” replies the visitor, “let me put a question to thy daughter.”—With these words he steps up to her, kisses her on the forehead, and thus addresses her: “God bless thee, lovely girl, who remindest me of the days of my youth. I have a son; he loves thee. Wilt thou make my declining years happy?”
The Tyrolese girls, equally modest and affectionate, can, it is said, rarely find words to answer this flattering question, so that their mothers are almost always obliged to be the interpreters of their sentiments. The lover is then introduced by a young companion: he enters, bringing the fruits of his industry and constancy, which he deposits at the feet of his new mother, whose affection he solicits. The kiss of peace assures him of the kindness of the parents by whom he is adopted, and the first salute granted by his mistress bespeaks the ardour of her love.
The young companions of the bride likewise receive a kiss from the bridegroom and wishes for their future happiness. The most intimate of her friends then conducts the bridegroom to his destined spouse and retires; on which the spokesman of the family rises and begins a long harangue on the good qualities of the young man. Though rarely listened to by the young folks, who have much to say to one another, he nevertheless relates with emphasis the various trials to which the bridegroom has been subjected, and concludes with congratulating the damsel on having inspired him with a passion so strong as to surmount them all.